PinnedAustin AdamsinSlackjawI Was 100% On Board With My Open Relationship Until This Helicopter Showed UpA military helicopter making my wife swoon and probably get horny is not at all what we agreed to.Mar 21, 202117Mar 21, 202117
Austin AdamsinThe HavenCome Help Your Grandmother Get Out Of This Daggone Medium ArticleHoney, I can’t figure this thing out.Nov 30, 20212Nov 30, 20212
Austin AdamsinSlackjawWe Can Reverse Global Warming If Johnny Depp Is Fired From The Role Of Captain Jack SparrowWhen a real climate scientist speaks, you listen.Oct 10, 20211Oct 10, 20211
Austin AdamsinMuddyUmI Hope This Email Finds You Well As I Am Sending It From A CavePlease readAug 31, 20212Aug 31, 20212
Austin AdamsinSlackjawThings I Heard My Boss Say Instead of “You’re Fired”It’s a good thing he didn’t fire me.Aug 23, 20215Aug 23, 20215
Austin AdamsinThe HavenI’m Natalie Portman And This Is My Medium Writers Challenge SubmissionWhat’s up, losers!Aug 18, 20216Aug 18, 20216
Austin AdamsinThe HavenYou Wandered Into Branghood Forest Where Witches Lay Eggs That Make You Hotter And Didn’t Invite Me?I thought we were way closer than that.Aug 16, 2021Aug 16, 2021
Austin AdamsinThe HavenWelcome To The Little Shop That You Walk Around In And Never Buy Anything From, AssholeHi! Welcome in.Aug 13, 20212Aug 13, 20212
Austin AdamsinSparken Flarf8 Ugly-Ass Fish That Couldn’t Be PresidentBig-eyed idiotJul 21, 20212Jul 21, 20212
Austin AdamsinSlackjawHow To Quickly Lose 15 Pounds And Also Transform Into Oscar the GrouchExercise 3 times per week and find a metal garbage can from the 1960s.May 26, 20211May 26, 20211