The Three Best Growth Strategies I Know

One creative I really admire is Carl Smith, who owns a strategy, design, and development studio called nGen Works. Several years ago at ConvergeSE, Carl told a story that illustrates one of the best growth strategies I know.

Before meeting with a particularly obtuse client, Carl printed out an agenda. As the client settled in, he glanced at the sheet of paper and noticed the first item on the list: “What’s this about discussing trust issues?!”

I’m not going to get Carl’s response exactly right, but his reply went something like this:

“Well, I’ve noticed that you don’t seem to give us the benefit of the doubt anymore. You fight every decision we make. If we have lost your trust, then we need to talk about earning it back. And if we can’t win back your trust, then we need to figure out how to part ways amicably.”

(Kudos for the cojones, Carl!)

When you consider that nGen Works has a portfolio full of blue-chip brands, including Nintendo, National Geographic, and Starbucks, then you begin to realize how much was on the line that day. This wasn’t a “small” client.

What would have happened to the company’s payroll if that client had stormed out of the meeting? Or had fired off a nasty tweet? Or had sued?

When the lifetime value of a client relationship far exceeds a $25,000 website or a $100,000 product launch, courage, honesty, and humility become more costly. Say the wrong thing, piss off a client, and lose her forever. That day, Carl was able to open better lines of communication and salvage the relationship.

He did the hard thing necessary to keep his client.

Passivity is even more expensive than honesty.

But even if the story didn’t have a happy ending, we creatives can learn a second high-dollar lesson:

When you avoid doing the hard thing, you will lose not only the healthy conflict and the stronger communication that grows out of it but also your self-respect.

• Passivity tells you that for her to walk all over you is better than for her to leave.
• Passivity tells you to take the abuse and earn your stripes because things will eventually get better.
• Passivity and fear join forces to brutalize your good judgment and common sense: If I say what I’m really thinking, then I’ll lose this project, and this relationship, and my reputation, and my business, and my livelihood, and my well-being.

We don’t realize we’re going there, but we do. We attribute to people and situations, emails and meetings more power than they really have.

“Do what I say, or else.”

How many “elses” have in actuality shown up and ruined your life?

The funny thing about people who threaten to tarnish your reputation is that their reputations precede them too. Their reputations aren’t sterling. Their supposed posse of cronies and toads won’t hurt you as much as you think. And even if some people do take what that bully, critic, or naysayer says at face value, those people’s collective belief isn’t a powerful malignant force. They will quickly move on to the next controversy or tidbit of gossip.

In fact, some of the people in that posse aren’t cronies at all but mature, level-headed individuals who will be inclined to admire you if you stood up to the bully.

The enemy of their enemy is a friend. Offend a jerk, and win a friend.

In my experience most critics and bullies go looking for easier prey as soon as you stand up to them. They don’t like a real fight. After all, the need to dominate and control has insecurity at its root.

A real fight is too risky because a bully doesn’t want his insecurity exposed. Better to offer a flimsy excuse — “You’re not worth my time” — and beat a hasty retreat.

But enough talk about bullies. Most of your clients aren’t actually trying to bully you. They’re simply anxious. They’re fallible human beings with fears and needs, and the biggest fear is that those needs won’t be met.

Two Powerful Questions

The best way to diffuse that fear is to ask a client, “What do you need?” And then to follow up with, “What are you afraid will happen?”

Once you get those knots out on the table, you can start untying them.

That includes being honest about your own needs and fears: “I really need to be fully present with my kids at night, so when you call me during dinner, you’re taking me away from my family. My family are my biggest supporters, and I can’t do my best work for you unless I protect my time with them.”

Do you have the guts to say something like that? Can you check your ego at the door and be vulnerable?

Consistent vulnerability saves relationships.

Consistent vulnerability will inspire your clients’ confidence. You’ll find that when you lead with vulnerability, your clients will follow. When the lifetime value of a single relationship can pass the million dollar mark, letting a client simply slip away is folly.

Three Ways Clients Slip Away

How do we let clients slip away? Well, three reasons immediately come to mind. None of them will surprise you.

Reason #1 — Passivity

Carl’s story clearly falls into this category. He sensed some distance, or maybe he sensed the client’s frustration in a curt email or sarcastic remark. Instead of being passive, he pressed in.

Think about the gumption required: admit to yourself that things aren’t good, ponder what to do about it, pick a strategy, schedule the meeting, show up for the meeting, take your punches from the client.

Not easy, to say the least.

Small wonder that many of us, rather than schedule a difficult conversation, will bop along with our work and pretend as though nothing is wrong.

Then, we’re shocked — yes, we even feel betrayed! — when we hear that the client quietly hired a new writer, a new design shop, without even having the decency to give us a heads up!

Actually, we do notice weirdness, and we feel anxious about it. That vague sense of menace in the back of our minds inhibits our ability to do our best work. Yet, ostrich-with-your-head-in-the-sand passivity keeps you from picking up your phone.

So take some time right now to ask yourself these questions:

• Where are you being passive in your work?
• What hard conversations do you need to have?
• What apologies do you owe?
• What reparations do you need to make?

Or on a more positive note, what thank you notes do you need to write?

If your clients want to leave, it’s probably because you aren’t giving them good reasons to stay.

So do the hardest work of all, and let your clients teach you how you can improve or how you need to be more proactive, professional, or thoughtful.

Reason #2 — Hurt Feelings

Ego is a main ingredient in creativity. We creatives believe the world needs our art, our innovative ideas, our panache. I’ll be the first person to tell you: I know I’m good at what I do, and I take pride in my work.

But because we’re bound to work with people who don’t make a regular habit of acknowledging and celebrating our contributions, that same pride backfires.

Passion turns to frustration. Frustration becomes resentment. Resentment becomes bitterness.

Rather than talk about my feelings—certainly not in a business context!—I nurse resentment and feed my pride. My pride has affected both my friendships and my business relationships.

Have you ever gotten your feelings hurt by a client and withdrawn?

He rejected your perfectly good (or even brilliant) ad campaign because he wasn’t the one who thought of it. So what?

She blamed you unfairly for a missed deadline. So what?

The marketing director scoffed at your initial logo treatment, made you feel incompetent and small, but when the CEO loved it, the dude took credit. Unbelievable!

So what? Hurt feelings happen all day, ever day.

Manage the maelstrom.

You need to proactively deal with your hurt feelings: your piqued sense of justice or fairness, fear, outrage, sadness, and even a certain pettishness because you’re a beautiful flower and you want to be admired, not trampled.

So what? She’s a beautiful flower too. Get on the phone with her. Keep it brief. Share how her words or actions made you feel. Propose how you can have a stronger working relationship in the future. And forgive her.

Press in, then move on because, in business, your hurt feelings have a price tag. You cannot nurse resentment and do your best work.

And look on the bright side: Even if that heart-to-heart chat blows up in your face, at least you know that the client was in fact in the bottom 10%. You can fire him/her and get on with your life sooner rather than later.

Reason #3 — Silence

You may lose a client here and there, but probably not for the reasons you think.

Client relationships die for the same reason that marriages die.

The fire goes out slowly, over the months and years, because one or both of you stopped trying. You grew apart. You stop opening the door for her. The lingerie stays in the drawer. Long familiarity replaces polite gestures. You give each other crumbs, not your best stuff.

How do you keep the romance alive?

As a general rule, you keep clients by making them feel special. My grandmother would probably call it “thoughtfulness.”

• Giving small gifts.
• Mailing hand-written notes.
• Doing favors and acts of service (off the clock).
• Saying thank you.
• Saying I’m sorry.
• Asking what you can do to help.
• Asking how you can improve.
• Choosing your battles.
• Fighting for clear, copious, consistent communication.
• Keeping promises.
• Keeping in touch.

About keeping in touch: I’ve become fanatical about adding people to Highrise. It’s certainly not the best-looking or most powerful CRM out there. But as a non-techie, I only needed the .22 rifle, not the bazooka.

One thing I’ve consistently failed at in the past is staying in touch with clients.

Sure, if my pipeline started to dry up, I’d email every client and prospect I could think of in a three-day period. But clear, copious, continuous communication? Not so much.

My old clients had no clue when I got into mobile app development or when I became conversant in lean startup methodology. They might have new needs, but they certainly wouldn’t associate me with them.

Yet, I know from experience that when I put in a touch here and a touch there that they remember me. And when they have more work, I’m the obvious choice. The business-y term is “top-of-mind awareness.”

People can’t hire you if they forget about you, so take the time to say, “Hi. I’m still here, making awesome stuff. What’s up with you these days?”

In closing out this long, meandering post, let me share one of a favorite new hacks. You’ve heard of Gmail. You’ve heard of Highrise. What about Ecquire? It is a Chrome extension that serves as a bridge between Gmail and Highrise.

From inside Gmail, I can create a new Highrise contact, and Ecquire then sucks in and auto-populates all of that person’s information. I can also automatically add new email conversations to that Highrise contact.

Rather than log in to Highrise and manually input each and every contact, I can now keep my network vital and up-to-date with three clicks in five seconds.

Once those I’ve got those people captured in Highrise, I can set reminders to follow up, stay in touch, and find some small way to be thoughtful.

The Three Best Growth Strategies I Know

Most clients don’t leave because you made some epic blunder. They leave because you weren’t honest, you weren’t vulnerable, and you didn’t make them feel special.

Yesterday, I received a black hoodie and a note from Upwork. I’ve been using Upwork since the oDesk days before the merger with Elance, and they wanted to say thank you. I felt special.

So be like Upwork. Show the love!

Honesty, vulnerability, and thoughtfulness are the three best growth strategies I know. Practice them, and you’ll get more work from existing clients, more referrals, and more new clients already sold on the idea of working with you.

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Originally published at Austin L. Church.