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Hello Dave,

It is that we have some common ground. It’s also ironic, if we were the same age and neither of us was spoken for, we would agree not to date one another.

I come from the era before there was identity politics surrounding trans people. Yes, some people got “clocked” (aka, “read”) but mostly we did not. Mostly we simply blended into society and so I am really not an activist, though I support people who wish to be out and active. It’s 100% okay by me. I am also a strong defender of the CD (crossdressing) community.

I medically transitioned 40+ years ago as a 20-something, hence my mentioning the age difference and so having kids or even remembering what it was like to pretend to be a boy is back there with graduating from high school and the Kennedy assassination. I never had kids and don’t even know if I could have had them. I never had motilities checked and I was taking what estrogen I could find as a college student.

But to the main point: I really do believe that if someone is set on not dating people of a certain type, it is up to the person who has the objection. Let me give you the following case. Say I am dating a guy who is Vietnam era (my era) and we hit it off and we starting smooching and then he says, “I know I killed 34 people — that I know of — in the Vietnam War. Though I should tell you before this goes any further.” Maybe he does not want to talk about it to his date. Maybe he has PTSD and maybe that might be an issue, but my the fact that during Vietnam I was dressing like a coed — is that really germane?

I didn’t just fall off the back of the potato truck. I get that people get really worried about what someone was assigned at birth. I’ve had my head shrunk about it, but good. I get it. And I have sat down with someone I was serious about, but this was before I transitioned. I would say I was contemplating transition so this would impact us.

After transition, I told two different people about my past and regretted it — not immediately for it did change anything, but long term. So I am not sure I agree I must sound off about it.

Can you see my point?