I took the full leave available to a California Dad for all of my children after my wife returned to work from her leave. It came out to be about two months each time. During this time, my babies and I were inseparable (mostly out of necessity). Because my wife wasn’t home, anywhere I wanted to go (say the hardware store) had to fall within the baby’s schedule and required some serious strategy, with many false launches. I started the leave with grand visions of everything I could accomplish in two months and quickly was hit with the reality that my highest priority was my child. Although I had to let go of the gutter repair, tile jobs, and other home improvement plans, I actually bonded with my babies and was often reminded of the time my father spent with me and my place in humanity.

When I returned to work, my colleagues and supervisor were generally supportive. I do think that my career track took a back seat during those times, but that is part of managing new priorities and building your identity as a father. In many ways the fact that I took time off sent signals to my team that family is important to me and made it easier to prioritize my life accordingly.