An Apology Letter To My Friend

Dear Nash,
You came to me for advice and I fed you with lies. For that, I’m truly sorry.

It was a cold evening after the second semester exams, almost everyone had travelled home and the hostel was practically empty. I couldn’t bring myself to present the same pathetic results from the first semester to my mum so I stayed behind waiting for the release of results. You came to my place that evening wearing a gloomy look but I was too engulfed in my own issues to inquire why you looked so worn out. The only thing I remember asking you was why you hadn’t left for Buea yet – well to be honest I didn’t necessarily want an answer, I was just being polite.

You told me you were in a big mess and needed my counsel. You said you were three months pregnant for your boyfriend and that was what was keeping you from going home. You didn’t ask for advice on the baby but about the baby’s father – your boyfriend. 
You said he’d promised to take proper care of you and the baby, he’d provide you monthly allowance , that he asked you halt your studies this year and that he was going to walk you down the aisle.

I know that this guy is jobless, isn’t a hustler though a master’s student, already a father to a 2year old boy which he had during his undergraduate years in Buea, that he’s an addicted womanizer, has a rape record, got delivered in church for lust, has duped numerous students of their money; even me and that not a single person in the area could put in a good word for him.
I also know that you failed almost all your courses during the first semester, that this is your first year in the university and that you are way older than I am.
I know that he’s not a bad guy totally though his faults greatly outweigh his strengths.

I told you he’s a good and that you should stick with him. I’m glad I didn’t say more but I shouldn’t have lied for I doubted the very words I spoke. I sugarcoated my words and not a thing I said to you that evening was true.

For that I’m sorry.

I can’t write down all I wish I’d said but here are the most important.

I’m probably the last person you should ask for advice from considering the fact that I’m more of a friend to him than you.

Never trust a man entirely unless you can trust yourself.

Do not boast about your man’s inability to cheat before those who know him well than you do; it makes you stupid.

Not all men cheat; yet a lot of them do.

Do not halt your studies for any reason; you are not the first to have a baby.

Listen to his male friends but take advice from his female friends. Women are jealous and in their jealousy they speak the truth, men stick up for each other and cover their trails.
You're gonna get hurt
I don't think he's the best guy for you.

Note to self: I'll tell my friends and family the truth no matter how ugly it may be. It'll save me energy and probably keep me from writing such long post filled with regret.