Social Reciprocity

With a surge in people taking a hiatus from social media as part of a New Year resolution or for other personal reasons, it’s useful to understand reciprocity and how it applies to our social lives. Human beings are wired to reciprocate; returning love with love, attention with attention, and for many hate with hate.

Reciprocity can be seen everywhere; mutual embracing, Facebook messaging, the prolonged gazing into each other’s eyes, and as the separation anxiety that’s felt when the other person isn’t present.

We learn to expect reciprocity, even demand it within a self determined period based on our social history with friends and colleagues. Should a friend not satisfy our need for a reciprocal relationship, we feel adrift, alienated, even slighted.

The morals of this short piece, if there are any, are twofold:

• “Give someone a break” when they stop conforming to your social expectations; we don’t know what’s going on in their private lives, maybe they “just need a break” themselves.
• If you “free ride” on the acts of others without contributing yourself, eventually you’ll end up alienating yourself from some individuals.