Enough of this Trump Bullshit.

For real.
Donald Trump Supporters, you’re worse than Obama Supporters. Hell, you’re a lot like them in many many ways but at this point, there’s just no excuse for you. You are a cult. You don’t have any core principles other than looking out for Number 1. You’re a bunch of selfish fucking assholes with a grip on reality that is fast approaching escape velocity to the outer regions of insanity.

Listen, you filthy sons o’ bitches, we here at Awesome Rants aren’t like Rush Fucking Limbaugh, we aren’t going to suck your dicks and pretend like you have all kinds of excuses to be angry. Fuuuuuck that shit. Angry drunks beat their wives, that doesn’t excuse 1. Getting hammered and 2. Beating your wife.

Let’s get one thing fucking straight.

Donald Trump will never be the President of the United States.

Get it out of your vacuous fucking heads. NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.

And this has nothing even to do with Ted Cruz’s Excellent Delegate Adventure or the Evil GOP Establishment®.

It has to do with the fact that Trump is fucking insane and can’t shut his fucking mouth for five fucking seconds long enough to stop literally shitting all over every single demographic in the fucking country including you, his personal asslickers. The BEST asslickers. The most LUXURIOUS asslickers.

Just because y0u like being treated like dogshit does not mean the rest of the fucking country is so enamored. This means, they will actually see that this guy is a total incompetent catastrophe hellbent on setting forest fires on every bridge he can find to the tune of 70% UNFAVORABLE RATINGS.

That’s like the iceberg to the Titanic.

And you should be happy about this because this guy is the biggest fuck-up in the history of politics with a personal life and business record that is a raging fucking dumpster fire in a radioactive waste disposal site. He’s not a billionaire, he just plays one on TV. Why do you think he doesn’t release his tax returns? BECAUSE HE’S FULL OF SHIT, THAT’S WHY.

Right now he’s the grass is greener on the other side guy only when you get to the other side, it’s really just concrete painted green. We are not shitting you. Have you ever tried running a slip ‘n slide on hot green pavement? It’s about as much fun as being a reporter within arm’s reach of Corey Lewandowski.

We hate Hillary Clinton, we know that she would be a fucking unmitigated disaster for this country but here’s the REALITY (We keep saying REALITY a lot because we want this to sink in): Hillary Clinton would beat the shit out of Trump in a general election. Beat the everloving fucking hell out of him. We are talking Reagan vs Mondale level here.

Yes, we are invoking Ronald Reagan in comparison to the level of utter annihilation that Hillary would visit on the Donald.

SO ENOUGH WITH YOUR BULLSHIT. Get your heads out of your asses and PAY THE FUCK ATTENTION.

Donald Trump is not going to build a fucking wall. He is LYING TO YOU. He is playing you. He is acting like the worst conservative caricature that your bitchy ass neice who wears Birkenstocks and free bleeds can come up with. He’s a raging misogynistic hateful douchebag with an ego measured in the fucking parsecs and a total disregard for anyone who dares not fall prostrate in front of him. His campaign is built on lies and personal attacks without the first fucking hint of a semblance of an actual platform or idea about how to accomplish any of the bullshit he spews. He is spewing random bullshit and you are swallowing it like a German fucking porn star.

He isn’t going to get Apple fucking Computers built in the United States. That’s like saying that he’s going to get Scotch Whiskey made in fucking New Jersey. It doesn’t even make sense. And if you think it’s hard to buy shit now, wait until he slaps a 45% tariff on your precious fucking $15,000 Hyundais and makes them retail for 22 large. That’s so much winning we bet you won’t even be able to handle it.

The President of the United States is not a motherfucking dictator. As much as Obama has tried to make it seem like it is, it is not the case. You don’t want a fucking dictator whether or not you think he’s your guy. This country is not built that way. So enough with the Trump Bullshit. Ted Cruz is like vegetables to you, we know, but vegetables make your body healthy even if you are lacking in the IQ department. So do us all a favor and shut the fuck up and spare us your middle school memes because the adults are here and though you hate being talked down to and ignored, it’s time to look in the the fucking mirror and ask yourself a question:

Why do I want to vote for a New York Liberal who gave money to Charlie Fucking Rangel and thinks Al Sharpton is the fucking man?

Why indeed.

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