At many points in your life you have to choose, if you want to be the one who suffers or the one who takes a risk and at the same time could lose very much.

Yet again I am at a point where I want to tell a person how I feel but I choose to be the good friend, to be nice. Not to be the bitch, the destroyer, the villain but also to be the SILENT. And I know I simple could hope that I still be the good friend because I’m honest but at the same time I’m afraid that I am the loser, the stupid and the fail that can’t do anything and makes people mad and destroys what they have achieved.

At which point can you say I may selfish but honest, I may be canting but good and I may be the villain of her story but the hero of my own.

If you stay silent you suffer. You feel uncomfortable and weak. Like you are in the ocean and waves carry you away from the beach you truly want to reach. And you want to talk because you have feelings, too. And when you decide to talk to someone you realize that you have no right to judge someone. That you can’t talk bad about someone even if you may be right. Because in the end you the gossiper and the weak.

But when I choose to make a SOUND, to raise my voice and be strong again, to be the honest person I always wanted to be, I have a feeling of relieve and fear. Relieve that I am who I am and fear that I lose something important. At which point is it acceptable to put your own peace over the one of someone else. At which point do we learn to stop being afraid of the truth we want to tell and of the answers we could get. When will we stop to be afraid of the maybe, the what if and of the unknown?

If I sit at home and try to hold back my tears what kind of person am I?

If I stand up and tell my truth with all my heart what kind of person am I?

And as you can see I don’t know where I should go. What I should do. I only know that I don’t like to be the honest one. But I don’t want to be the liar either.

It doesn’t matter which way you choose you can always lose a lot. Maybe all you be or got.

-The Opposition