Obituary of an Ideas Guy
______, best known locally as the most prolific entrepreneur our city never had, passed away last weekend due to atrophy of the right hemisphere of the brain, a region best associated with executive function. He is survived by his wife of many years who fondly remembers the many dates they didn’t go on, or all the times they thought of new places to not move together. He is also survived by members of his immediate family who were “shocked and upset” at the tragic loss of his will in a freak housefire localized to his desk, but are definitely certain that he would have wanted an exceedingly simple and not-at-all exorbitant and complicated memorial service. They are also exceptionally thankful that he intentionally left the process in their hands and definitely did not forget to get an actual executor for his will. Close friends of his, when asked about their most cherished moments with him, recall how wonderful it was to regularly ride the rollercoaster of excitement and riveting vision-building, followed immediately by a total lack of implementation and subsequent discouragement. Others were more mystified however, because they remembered how he had recently thought of how “great” it would be to die suddenly and in this precise way and are left wondering whether it was simply a tragedy of chance or if he had actually gone forward with something for once. Either way, he will be somewhat missed.