Power of being interested than be interesting
You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” — Dale Carnegie.
The quote is from the article “How to win friends and influence people” by Dale Carnegie. I found this book to be very motivating and thought-provoking. It’s also probably the single book that’s had the biggest impact for my life so far. When I go through this book I come across a mind opening reality that in what thing the peoples are interested? They are not interested in us, not in others but only in themselves. So, if we wanted to appear interesting to others or wanted to win other hearts then we have to show our interest towards other. So, when we show our concern towards others it automatically makes their mind towards us.
Let us take few examples from a daily life. A dog is the only animal that makes his living by giving us nothing but love. When we have pets at our home then we will get attaches to them because they show their love towards us. Similarly, if an author does not like the peoples then surely his stories will not be accepted by the peoples. So, he has to be interested in people if he wants to be a successful writer of stories.
Likewise, there are thousands of stories in our life where we come to know that people will only be interested in us if we show our concern towards them. This is the biggest lesson I get from this book and tried to implement it in my life. I think most of the time in our life we are just trying to tell the people just our own story but not wanted to listen them, that’s the biggest mistake we do. If we wanted to be loved by others, then we have to show our love for others.
As it is said that “if you want to be a good conversationalist, be a good listener. To be interesting, be interested’. I think by opening yourself up to all that you can learn from others, you can live a more fulfilling life, regardless of whether your motivations are professional or personal. Truly engage with people and be genuine — you will make connections that can create new opportunities you never thought possible.
After reading the book I decided to take an interesting challenge in which I talked with the different peoples around me and show my concern towards them. And I asked them the questions about their life like, how are you? How’s your life is going? what are your future plans? and lot more. They answered me in very good manner and I also found some people were very surprised because now a days everyone is just wanted to share their own views but not listening to others. And a very interested thing happened while I was trying to complete this challenge. There was a new comer girl, who recently joined the university and come to share a room with me. So instead of being rude and telling her about the rules as most of the people do with new comers, I talked very graciously with her. I found that she was so concerned about how she will live here without her parents and she was also frightened by the behavior of girls which she experienced while living in another room. She was very surprised by my behavior as she was not expecting this from a senior. Soon she opens up to me and we develop a very good friendship. And latter on she told me that was the time she has decided to leave her education and the hostel, but it was my behavior and my positive attitude which gave her courage to face all difficulties. That was really a compliment for me. And I learned a big lesson for my life that If we wanted others to like us, if we wanted to develop real friendships, if we wanted to help others at the same time as we help our self, keep this principle in mind “Become genuinely interested in other people”.