Saying “no” isn’t always nice, but it is necessary. — Several months ago, just as a pandemic weary world was getting excited about a new app called Clubhouse, I hosted a conversation that I cheekily called “The Audacity of Nope.” …

If women are the prize for men’s success, they can’t fully love and humanize a partner — “I am the prize” is a single woman’s mantra. It’s how we remind ourselves that we are worthy of love. But what happens when a woman is the literal prize of a man obsessed with winning? …

Pandemic isolation may be beneficial in helping us get in touch with our truest sexual desires — Remember sex? We went from hot-girl summer to celibate-girl winter in the blink of an eye. Covid-19 put an abrupt end to barhopping — and bed-hopping — shuttering us indoors to be alone with our thoughts and our most instinctive cravings. …

She had it all and still stayed. It’s an eye-opening account. — Money and power won’t shield you from domestic abuse. It’s a symptom of how we love. Popular singer FKA Twigs stunned fans when she filed a lawsuit alleging severe abuse at the hands of her former boyfriend, actor Shia LaBeouf. The 32-year-old ethereal powerhouse is known for her wildly conceptual…

We don’t have to dim ourselves to get what we want. It’s out there. — When California rapper Saweetie appeared on Instagram Live with her boyfriend, Quavo, and told women that a man isn’t worth dating “if he’s not getting you a Birkin,” it sparked a heated debate about women and their standards. How high is too high? …

Whether or not a woman chooses to submit in a relationship has to do with her finances as well as narratives imposed upon her race — Jeannie Mai ignited an impromptu gender war when she announced that she wanted to “submit” to her soon-to-be husband, rapper Jeezy, during an episode of The Real. “I’m a very dominant woman,” she explained to her fellow castmates, “so when I come home, I like the idea that my man…

Do you think monogamy was put in practice to benefit women? Think again. — In 2017 I was shooting an episode of the Grapevine where the topic of discussion was gold diggers. I attempted to explain the subtle ways our romantic customs center male desire, often at the expense of female agency. That’s when I said it, before a room of cheering women, and…

In matters of love, it’s important to know the difference between boundaries and walls — Ayesha Faines is ZORA’s newest Sex & Relationships columnist. You’ll be hearing from her on a biweekly basis. I’ll never forget the woman who asked me how she could open herself to love again. I was speaking on a panel in Brooklyn, and I can still picture the vacant look…

Women are not sacrificing their time — or health — for superficial pairings anymore — Ayesha Faines is ZORA’s newest relationships columnist. You’ll be hearing her musings on the intersection of love and power on a biweekly basis. This column is her debut. “Before Covid, you could never get people to be open,” my college friend said one night over Zoom. “Men wanted to go…