The #1 Fear Every Man Struggles with Every Day…
When you woke up this morning, what was the first thought that came to your mind? Was it “I NEED COFFEE”?! Or maybe it was, “Dear God, where is the bathroom.” Or quite possibly it was this: “I just need one more hour.”
While it may not have been your first thought there’s a good chance your second or third opening line to your morning routine sounded something like this:
“I didn’t get enough sleep.”
Well, it’s true. In all likelihood, you probably didn’t get enough sleep. I get it. We have hard-wired ourselves to believe we’ll sleep when we die. We won’t cut it loose to say our lives.
But this is more than about sleep. I asked you that question about the first thought out of your mind when you wake up because, for all of us, the result is the same regardless of what we think or say:
You and I begin our lives every day in scarcity. We start it in a deficit.
I didn’t get enough sleep. I didn’t’ get enough time at the gym. I didn’t get enough done at work today. Whatever IT may be, we’ve got a problem on our hands.
You and I live our lives as if we are not enough.
We live our entire lives believing we are in a deficit. We believe the world has this bar that exists and we are to reach it no matter what. The problem is, the bar is always moving — up and down — and we always seem to miss the mark.
We’re not good enough, smart enough, good-looking enough, athletic enough, strong enough…loveable enough.
This is the number one fear every single guy faces:
Am I enough?
We are scared to death that we are not enough.
Now, at this point, you can hit the little “x ” on your browser, get rid of me, not believe a word I just said and keep moving on with your life. That’s fine. I’ll be here when you decide to come back. But if you decide to stick around it’s because something inside of you believes it.
I, beyond the shadow of a doubt, believe in this fear. Why? Because for most of my life I lived it. I lived my life believing I wasn’t enough. In fact, you and I will spend the rest of our lives dealing with this problem. The natural question then comes — “Sooo, why deal with it?” Why not just coast through life?
Because there is a better life waiting for you. It’s a life I know you want and it has nothing to do with deficits.
So, where do we begin? If we were made for something greater — to make a dent in this world with a long-lasting impact without deficits, how do we begin?
We start right here — at our hearts. See, the world, you know, with that ever moving bar of excellence or enough has taught us that we’ve got to somehow stifle the most powerful organ in our body — the heart. Keep your emotions locked up, don’t show you are afraid. The problem is this has gotten us nowhere but a weak and sickly generation of young men who now have a heart full of fear, zero confidence, who suck at relationships and aren’t sure if they have what it takes to do something in this world. I can say this because I am him — I am this generation.
So to fix all that has been broken — to build the strong relationships you and I need to make a dent in this world, we have to begin here — the heart. You and I must learn to turn around back into our lives and address the fears, hurts, and failures that are controlling our lives. See, I believe the best life you can have moving and living forward is by first turning around and going back.
And I get it — our past….is, well, our past. And it’s not easy to address or come to grips with. But for you to live this life you want to live, that you keep dreaming up, thinking about and even planning for as a young man — you’ve got to make it first, a matter of the heart.
So, where do we begin? Well, right here. You’re in the right place. That’s why this community exists. We are called to do this together and the life you want to make for yourself will never be done on your own. It will be in the context of you building and fostering healthy relationships in all areas of your life.
So, my challenge to you, as I leave you today is this — don’t run from your hurts and fears of relationships gone by just to avoid them — because you can’t. Do the work of the heart, kick fear to the curb and gain the confidence you need so you can build strong relationships so you can make a dent in this world.
Your Call to Action…
- Grab my FREE Book DON’T SUCK and get started in overcoming this massive fear today! Download it now.
- It won’t be easy, but make a venture into your heart this week. Sit down and get quiet with yourself. How do you truly answer the question — “Am I enough?”
- Engage in the conversation happening below.