15 years

When your marriage is old enough to drive

Nathan Weaver 🐼
Aug 1, 2018 · 4 min read

Today, August 1, in the grand old year of 2003 we celebrated a wedding. Our own. It was a whirlwind of a day, filled with a lot of running around for me, as I had committed to making sure everything was getting done and in its place, so Crystal could focus on hair, dress, etc. Honestly, looking back, I don’t remember a whole lot throughout the day. I remember running all over the place, taking care of things, but I don’t remember what in the world those things were. What I do remember is when it was almost time and onward.

Here are a few interesting tidbits about our wedding:

  • We used a lot of movie/theatre music (Lord of the Rings, Phantom of the Opera, etc).
  • Our colors were blue (her favorite) and orange (my favorite) with white for accenting between the two and silver was used for the fathers’ ties and vests instead of blue.
  • Yes, vests, our tuxedos were three-piece and had neckties not bow. Bow ties are lame and three-piece suits are fine.
  • I wore a two-toned tuxedo: white top, black bottoms with two-toned shoes. Because that’s how I roll.
  • My wife wore a white cloak over her bridal dress.
  • The feminine side had a renaissance vibe in black and blue.
  • We did not do the Electric Slide.

Interlude: One of our wedding songs

In the beginning…

Before there was a wedding, there was a little dating, and then a little more engagement.

My senior year in high school, after several years of a failed dating life, I had decided to put that hot mess on hold until after college. Except we didn’t say hot mess back then. And so, I managed to bounce back from a lot of depression, and one suicidal moment, to plow through the rest of my senior year. But as prom was approaching, Amber Stratman asked me one day if I was going with anyone to prom. I wasn’t going to prom, so that was a no. But she pushed the idea of me asking one Crystal Whitson, and I was thinking about how I had been trying to avoid those kinds of things. And as I recall, I asked if Crystal was even interested in that. I had no desire in getting my hopes up to be dashed again. And after feeling like she had confirmed Crystal was wanting me to ask, I decided to break my habit of staying away from all that romantic jazz.

So, I asked her, and she said yes. Later I would find out, it was something she really wanted, and others were pushing for it to happen, but I was so stuck in my “no more of this” ways, that I wouldn’t have noticed anything and graduated a month later never having asked her out.

That’s right. Senior prom was exactly one month from our graduation. In that short month, we began dating and a lot changed. And neither of us were ready to let that go, even though she had a full ride at University of Wisconsin-Superior, and I would be completing my education at SMS in Springield, Missouri (now MSU). We weren’t friends really, and spent very little time around each other all through high school until that last semester of high school when we worked together on the spring play. She was a crew member, and I did makeup. Yes, theatre makeup. It’s a thing I can do.

There was zero reason for the two of us to stay in contact after graduating. And if Amber and friends hadn’t pushed us to go to prom together, we’d likely never dated much less gotten married. So you can blame them. It’s their fault. Wait, what?

After we did the whole prom thing, we spent an insane amount of time together. We were practically inseparable. And by our three-month anniversary of dating, we announced an engagement. We had a very short dating life, but we had a year long engagement. Our engagement also included long-distance relations. And honestly, that engagement year was a beast when you think about it. Two people who hadn’t even been together for half a year, having a long-distance relationship several states apart, that’s enough to kill a relationship. But we were inseparable via instant messaging, as I recall. We spent a lot of nights messaging.

So… to review…

  • I went from hopeless romantic
  • To hopeless
  • To “whatev, I’m done with this”
  • To “OK, just this one thing”
  • To “Let’s get married!”
  • In less than a year

I guess the lesson here is instead of becoming an incel moron, you just let it ride and move on to other things for a while. Life moves at its own pace. You don’t have to rush any of it. Focus on living your life for a while.

Interlude — Most popular song of 2003

Conclusion

I really just wanted to write a little in recognition of this occasion. Fifteen years seems surreal. I can remember when I was a kid that I thought people who had been married for 20 years seemed old. Now, I’m like, well… it’s not that old. Haha…

Nathan Weaver 🐼

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Storyteller across many mediums. Actor, author, comedian, filmmaker. Freelance as a blogger, copywriter, and social media manager.