My nephew Micah is nearly three years old. He’s an animal. He’s a genius. He’s autistic.

He doesn’t speak yet. At least, not any words that I can understand. The new communication style I’ve been learning is different and wonderful. It includes sign language. It includes him clutching one of my large hands with both of his small hands and leading me somewhere, implying what he wants.

Two little hands wrapped around my big hand lead me to a couch. I know what he wants because we played a game on this couch once before. He bounces on the cushion a few times with his hands holding mine for support. Then he stretches out his arms. That means it’s time for me to pick him up off the couch and throw him up in the air. I catch him, set him down on the couch and with a playful shove send him sprawling into the cushions. We do this over and over.

I introduced him to the world of ice cubes, or what I call “water cookies.” At this point, he knows ice can be found in any number of places. From the refrigerator or from my drink cup. It’s a silly game. I hand him a piece of ice, he plays with it until it melts. Then he wants another. On and on it goes.

So far, my relationship with Micah is a series of these little games. I see it more as a series of little connections, though. With an autistic child, when you break through what can seems like an impossible barrier and see that you made an impression then that’s huge. I’m the only person that Micah plays the “ice game” with. That means a lot.

It’s funny, learning to interact with Micah reminds me of my first experiences talking to girls. I think most guys remember the semantics of trying to decipher if your crush liked you back or not. You went out on a limb with a text, received a response that was just a smiley face and you still reacted like:

I don’t know everything but I’m more and more cognizant of the importance of non-verbal communication. Beyond that, the importance of just picking up on cues. When someone remembers what you said in the past, you know they listened. When my sister brought me home part of her dinner when she went to a restaurant that I love, I knew she had been thinking of me. Words still mean a lot but demonstration is special and different. Whether you’re trying to remind someone that you love them or showing a co-worker that you recognize how hard they’re working — it’s important.