Applied Listening
In school days, during the post-class question hour, sometimes I used to blink for the question posed on me. My teacher used to scold — what the hell were you doing? you are physically present and mentally absent. Even now, while working on an activity, subconsciously I find myself virtually roaming around places where I haven’t been. It could happen to all of us and is natural. No need to panic. If its natural and no need to panic, why write this article? I will introduce you to Applied Listening, a concept borrowed by me from Science world.
Why do we context switch in our minds? One or more thoughts gets more attention and/or precedence than the current one because either new thoughts or actions provoking thoughts distract or attract us. How do we focus and avoid distractions? — will be my upcoming article.
Everything in this world can be tied through a process, so does listening. Listening is the ability to absorb what is conveyed, comprehend it, clarify questionable sections and rebuild the entire whole as it was conveyed without deviation. When this happens, the speaker and the listener are on same frequency.
Cousin of listening, active listening finds substantial discussion on writing space. Infact active listening requires practice and that practice is built through the process. Active listening advocates listener to keep their senses open, and being in present moment, look for clues verbal and non-verbal, and many more, which are attributes required to be an efficient listener. Lot of people produce hmms and aahs sounds, nod their heads, smile, keep their body posture in receiving mode. That’s pretentious listening.
Other formats of listening include happy listening, where your intent is to have fun without take-aways. Forced listening where you are deliberately made to listen whether you wish or not. Getting to level of an efficient listener requires consistently following a process and putting that into practice
Applied Listening is version of listening that inherits the art and science of listening. By art, I mean something that comes very naturally without a second thought, and performance of that activity flows gently like a stream even when there are interrupts of stone. By science, results from applying the practice can be demonstrated with results time and again with consistency.
Applied Listening is set of guiding principles that you can put to practice during a conversation using your knowledge to address the questions and problems within yourself, and determine the course of the conversation, before bringing it out, when you listen to others.
You will avoid scenarios where you can’t wait to hold yourself. Your instinct will never push you to respond or react. You will very well know the answer but wait for others responses. Even when you are being targeted in a conversation, you may never want to prove what was told was either right or wrong.
Applied Listening, you will be able to overcome the most difficult part of a conversation in the world of having the tendency to interject your partner. You will always be present in the present world rather than in past or future. You could sit and relax with visualizing the possibilities of different directions the conversations would have gone by without having to speak a single word. This will also avoid statements like — “Why would you do that? I just can’t bear that, and its unfair, totally unacceptable to me” and finally ending with bitter stressful situations and relationships.
With Applied Listening you will be able to master the art of keeping your mouth shut when others talk. You having the opportunity to analyze others before jumping into conclusions. You will not be carried away by the applauses received by others, just because you didn’t express it, thereby improving your emotional quotient. Many instances, you will get the results in way of affirmation. Audience will wait for your golden words.
