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I’ve always believed that your dating and sex life is the one area you are allowed to be as discriminate as you please, be it over race, gender identity or presentation, political leaning, body weight, how hot they are, etc.

Instead of resorting to shaming tactics, I would throw out a blanket “have you considered it?” to the world. It is your right to choose, and definitely follow your heart, but don’t limit yourself. I feel like a lot of people limit their choices not because it’s not their preference, but for fear of shame and judgment from their peers. And that is why we do not want to perpetuate shame as a behavior modifier.

Also, people seriously need to learn to deal with rejection. It says more about you to react by projecting shame on to someone who rejects you than it does about them rejecting you for whatever reason they may choose, even if it’s fear based, even if it just means they’re not ready yet.

We were all raised in the same culture, and whatever deprogramming you had to go through to transition, everyone around you has to go through to make room for you. Dating someone is very intimate.

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