E. in 2009

Becoming a mum

10 years ago I was about to become a mum. I was 25 and had no idea how this will change me. Here are the different things I learned on the go :

  • It is OK not to be perfect. The baby blues was very stressful and sometimes not understanding what your newborn needs can be really confusing. Your body is different, people treat you differently and you have a newborn to take care of. It’s a lot to bear! I learned to ask for help, call the Lèche league when I had problems with breastfeeding, etc. Many people were giving be advices but mostly I learned to listen to my instinct.
  • Trust your partner (if you have one). My partner in life was raised by his mum and grand mother, I was a bit worried on the type of father he could become, without any model, but he did find his place very naturally. He embraced this position and was the first to change nappies, wake up during nights, etc. before I was even capable of doing so. I knew I could trust him and this experience is strengthening our relationship day after day.
  • Maternity doesn’t (always) fall on you. I thought I would become a mum just when I will hold my newborn. But nothing happen. No sudden love and attachement. It took me some months to love my baby and to fully become a mum. But not to blame myself about this, took me a couple of years !
  • Kids are challenging your bias and opinions. Sometimes in a very disturbing and honest way. By asking many questions all the time, they make me reconsider some opinions. As they grow up, they make me grow up as well and force me to stay open minded.
  • I know what is important and what isn’t. Because kids are unpredictable, we learn to face things as they come and to react fast depending on the situation. But judging the urgency or not has become kind of a second nature (or a super power). Planning was already a skill I had, and it’s mandatory on a day to day basis to manage a family !

But if there is only one thing that I would like to share to new mums or mums to be, after these 10 years, is really BE SELF CONFIDENT. That’s the key !

The next 10 years will bring new challenges, but I'm ready :)

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