We’ll start with the powerful and serious. As you probably know, tragedy befell the city and citizens of Kenosha, WI this week after the shooting of Jacob Blake. In response, the NBA and other sports leagues refused to play their games. Chris Webber had some powerful words for the athletes and their response.
And now for the stupid stuff.
First it was wine windows in Italy. Now it’s cocktail windows in South Carolina. Or they could just be like San Francisco and shut down streets to let people party.
One of the greater untold cat and mouse stories: ATM Security Software vs. Jackpotters. Can’t wait to see it told in Ocean’s 14.
A Canadian biotech company is close to creating an invisibility cloak for military use. While this would undoubtedly increase a soldier’s stealthiness visually, the company still has no solution for the “Ope sorry didn’t see ya there” verbal tics.
French Toast Crunch is the Walkman to the Girl Scout Cookies new “Toast-Yay’s” iPod. But frankly, the Toast-Yay name sucks. Mockaroons. Toasty Le Pew’s. Cookie Monsieur’s. All better if you ask me.
Thanks to Kayal’s “Pump Up the Volume” movie night, I’ve got a new found appreciation for those sticking it to the man. And this Fortnite spot calling out Apple using Apple’s 1984 spot has got me all jacked up.
“Hi. Welcome to Winedy’s. What can I get you today?”
“Hi yes. Umm. I would like a ummm.. Pinot and…what’d you say you wanted?”
“Sorry what was that?”
“Oh no sorry…was talking to someone else. And a ummm Aperol Spritz.”
Redbone’s “Come and Get Your Love” gets an animated music video refresh. …
Sweatshirts here! $400 sweatshirts here! The US Marshals are selling leftover Fyre Festival swag to help refund the good people Billy McFarland hoodwinked and bamboozled.
If Fyre Festival swag isn’t your bag, try the USPS. USPS is constantly underfunded — and with mail-in ballots set to rise — they need some extra scratch. So they’re hawking fashionable crop tops and other USPS branded items. (Backpack on Page 2 is kinda dope.)
In a complete ripoff of Radar’s bop maker email, take a trip in the Nostalgia Machine for your Friday playlist.
You may know Iceland for it’s hot springs. Or maybe that Viking clap from the World Cup. Or being the bad guys in Mighty Ducks 2. Or that 18 month period where everyone and their mama went to Iceland and you learned how to pronounce Reykjavik by osmosis. But now you can know it as the place that broadcasts your screams. (Yes. I sent one.)
NASA sent a rover named Perseverance to Mars this week. In preparation, NASA had to make sure the capsule was spotless “to protect Mars from humans” and all their bacteria. …
Baby Bash: How’d you get so fly?
Sugar sugar: Actually, it’s kind of a cool story.
The NWSL will be expanding to LA thanks to a celebrity-filled ownership group. One owner may make daily naps mandatory while also ensuring the team takes strides in removing the stigma around “having poopy pants.”
“As much as possible, kiss only with your partner, and avoid deep kissing.” The only birds and bees advice I got or Japan’s new nightlife guideline? (Sidenote: “Disinfect the Microphone” would make a great name for a COVID rap album.)
Hey, they only…
Moonshine and moonshiners have a unique and often misunderstood place in American history. Check out these “Stories in the Shine” to get a better picture of the spirit that looks like water and tastes like fire.
Guy sells vintage Mario Bros game for $114,000. Immediately sends his father a Spongebob meme saying “vIdEo GaMeS wIlL rUiN yOuR LiFe!”
Disney World reopened this week amid a surge of Coronavirus cases in Florida. So the internet did what the internet does and turned Disney’s reopening promos into trailers for horror movies. …
Horseshoe crabs were always the most boring part of science museum field trips. But as it turns out their blood holds a key component for a Covid-19 vaccine. Obviously this means they’re being removed from their habitats by pharma companies at a heavy clip — at least this crew of horseshoe crabs is doing their best to replenish.
US, China and the United Arab Emirates are all sending spacecraft to Red Rocks this month. 10 to 1 says the US tries to make the other two countries play caravan games on the way up. …
It’s fitting that I get to send out this email leading into the July 4th weekend on July 2nd. “Well why’s that?” you’re all probably saying.
Because July 2nd is the date ole John Adams thinks should be the day we celebrate Independence Day.
He even wrote his wife saying that date will be celebrated with “Pomp and Parade…Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfires, and Illuminations from one end of this continent to the other.”
At least he was spot on with that. Personally, I’m a big bell guy on the 4th.
It’s July 4th because that’s the day we crossed…
Say what you want about Gen Z but, man, can they drag Millennials with the best of them.
The closing of public areas smothered a great US subculture: skateboarders. So, they turned their houses into skate parks and made a competition out of it. Here’s the winner of the #MurderYourHouse contest. Sadly, my submission of parkouring from one side of my couch to the other didn’t cut it.
We want to be the best advertising agency in the world.