We’re all jealous; I’m just one of the first to admit it.

Jealous, has always had a negative connotation that follows it. We’re told to never let it inhabit our thoughts and that it will only negatively impact our lives. I disagree; I believe that jealously should be used as a motivator, and that it can positively affect your work ethic.

Our view on jealously differs as we grow older. As children, if you’re parent or guardian turns their attention away from you to focus on something else, you do everything you can to get back in their line of site. You’re motivated and determined to be important, jealously drives you. This same motivation stays within you throughout youth, while playing sports, vying for attention and wanting to be the best. Jealously in no way inhibits you, it shapes you.

It seems that in high school, once appearances and failing come to matter, so does the idea of someone having a competitive advantage over you; because you begin to think that they’re better.

Don’t envy:

Envy is the forty foot sink hole between curiosity and optimism. Don’t let negative feelings stand in the way of an opportunity. Understand that at times, people may have more than you, but don’t let that derail your ambition. Nate Robinson could have sidelined his dreams of playing in the NBA by considering his height as a crunch. Instead, he conjured all of those feelings of “what if” and “maybe I can” into ambition and exercised on his dreams. He went on to be a force in the NBA.

Befriend:

All of my relationships with my friends and mentors stemmed from me being jealous of them. They were cooler, smarter, had more muscles or were more athletic than me and damn it I needed to find out what they did to get there. Rather than just accepting that they were able to do something better than me, I chose to befriend them and find out what they had done to achieve what it was that I was jealous of. In my experience, I’ve found that people are more enthusiastic in explaining how they got to be where they are as compared to what it takes to maintain their current status.

Immatate Don’t Duplicate:

Once you understand what the person did to gain these capabilities, begin incorporating some of their habits into your daily routine. If someone has a higher amount of energy and optimism than you and they attribute it to starting their day at 5 in the morning every day, then get up at that time. Yes, it may suck, but it’ll make you better. Get used to getting out of your normal cycle and try switching things up. Breaking habits will shake up your normal routine and open you to new ways of thinking and learning.

Don’t copy every move and action of the person you’re imitating. No one likes a copycat and you’ll lose the respect of the person you’re learning from.

There you have it. If you see someone that has something you want, rather than getting upset, acknowledge that you’re jealous and use it to propel you further.

Being jelly is not such bad thing. Mmmkay