i remember from a very young age watching boys and men

trying to emulate their mannerisms

the way they sit, the way they stand

the way they walk and talk

i wanted to exhibit masculinity and be like the boys

how do you become a man without the extra appendage

is that even what i want?

to be a man?

or is the power i feel through masculinity the end goal?

are my feelings of empowerment based on patriarchal views

or am empowered because i feel like my true self

because i feel like i don’t have to hide behind a facade

i don’t have to pretend to be soft when i’m not

there is no weakness in femininity but there is weakness in me

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