Negative thoughts are good. Here’s why.

If there’s one thing the recent trends in personal development have taught us, it’s to focus on positive thoughts and get rid of negativity. After all, negative thoughts are bad, right? (I mean, they’re called negative for a reason…)

Actually, no. This is a huge misconception! In fact, fighting negative thoughts isn’t going to make you more positive. It’s just going to make you repressed.

Here’s the thing: when you resist negative thoughts, they persist. So when you try to resist them, get rid of them, deny them, or disown them, it actually exacerbates them. Negative thoughts are an aspect of your self, and there is no point in trying to get rid of any aspect of your self.

Negative thoughts and positive thoughts are intimately connected. In fact, they’re mirror images of each other.

Behind every positive thought is a negative thought. They are just two sides of the same thing. As I’ve said before, the Universe is based on contrast, — you can’t escape it, so you may as well accept this reality and stop resisting your negative thoughts. Instead, be kind to them, and to yourself when you have them.

Judging yourself for having negative thoughts is like drinking your own poison.

Yes, negative thoughts are sometimes painful, but they are calling your attention to something important. Negative thinking can actually give birth to an awakening, so when you’re having a lot of negative thoughts, it’s often a sign that there is a reflection that desperately needs to surface.

Emotions like shame, fear, guilt, envy, or jealousy call out for your awareness. They need attention, like a small child crying for help. And the best thing you can do in these situations is to be totally present with those emotions.

Negative emotions are an invitation for unconditional love.

Most of the time, negative emotions show up to keep us safe, even if it’s not immediately clear from what. So when you’re experiencing negative thoughts, ask yourself, “How is this thought trying to keep me safe? What is it trying to keep me safe from?”

Every negative thought you have is in fact pointing you in the direction of something you desperately need, and desperately want, and as such, is leading you in the direction of your purpose. That means when you reject them … you’re rejecting yourself.

Consider this: what part of yourself do you reject when you turn away from negative thoughts? Ask the thoughts themselves, “What are you letting me know that I want or need? And how can I more directly meet that want or need?”

The truth is, you’re never going to get rid of negative thoughts. And that’s a good thing.

Because while your negative thoughts are an aspect of you, you are not your thoughts. And besides, believing that you “shouldn’t” be thinking negative thoughts is just going to suppress them, and anything that is suppressed is just going to become repetitive.

I want you to see your negative thoughts as valid and important, but not necessarily true.

Those thoughts need your loving care. So embrace your negative thoughts instead of resisting them, and you’ll no longer be at their mercy.

Do you struggle with negative thoughts? I’m here to help. Click here to find out how I can support you as you figure out your purpose and break down the blocks that are keeping you small.

Originally published at on March 6, 2017.