Expectations

I am a giver. I have always been and I believe that’s how I’ll be until the very end. I also happen to be a believer. I trust people, believe in them, believe in their dreams. That has led me into many different situations where people took advantage of me. It hurt, and it still does whenever it happens. It took me a long time and many unpleasant situations to realize that what actually makes me hurt isn’t being made a fool, but not having my expectations reached.

Throwing expectations away sets us free. It makes loving someone from who they are, accepting their growth and actually being happy for their achievements possible. It makes new scenarios something to look forward to, instead of dreading of. It makes any personal project about personal growth.

When people throw their expectations away it also sets us free. It makes being loved and having a relationship something organic and pleasant. It gives us courage to try new things, to be true to whoever and whatever we are. It makes experiencing things about the experience.

Having to live up to any sort of expectation is the fastest way to suffering and despair. I always tried to be what people thought or wanted of me, and as a result I now don’t really know what I like. I spent so much time trying to live up to different standards, in so many different areas of my life that I have very few experiences that were purely motivated (only) by myself. It’s easy to get lost in this momentum: you achieve so much that it feels like it’s the right path.

We, as humans, very often deposit a lot of expectations on other people and situations that we experience. It takes a daily exercise to refrain from doing it. That exercise is a necessary step into having healthy relationships — including with ourselves. Being free from any expectations I have started to get to know myself. I have started to pursue projects and situations because it is something I want. I have started feeling good about myself. I have started to actually love myself, just as I am, with all my growth possibilities. This is what I hope for you.

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