My Husband Is Always Annoyed With Me (My Husband Gets Irritated Easily)
“My husband is always angry and I can’t stand him anymore!” Little things can set him off and he will start to throw his temper at you or even the kids. Your tolerance is getting out of place too and you feel like divorcing him. Before you make up your mind to divorce him, probably you should relook what can be done to save your marriage first because a divorce should not be made hastily.
A husband getting angry all the time can be very frustrating in a marriage and this behavior must stop. When either one party is always angry, communication will become a problem. Hence, you need to set boundaries between your husband and you.
First, start to analyze and figure out when your husband starts to throw his temper at you. Did he get angry after a new job? Anything related to financial or commitment issues such as car, house, children or even family? Did you do anything unfaithful to him or probably he was like this all the while?
Come out with some solutions to the possible causes and find a good chance to have a private meeting with him. It will be best to have the private meeting where no one can hear the conversation and with no interruption.
Before you start telling him the problems that both of you are facing in the marriage, acknowledge his hard work and dedication to the family. Soften the approach by praising him first. Let him know how difficult it is for you when he gets angry and ask him what you can do to improve his temper and the marriage.
Agree on a plan to work on his temper and the marriage. If he is going to throw his temper again, let him know what you will do. Probably you can consider to bring your kids back to your parents and stay for a period of time if he gets angry over you again. This is to show him that you need respect and he cannot anyhow hurt you.
4 Ways to Repair a Marriage
1. Do what you do out of love.
Marriage should not be treated like a burden, but a gratifying experience. Everything you do should be done with no strings attached and from your heart. You and your spouse need to strike a balance of giving and taking. One of the easiest ways to ruin a marriage is to expect anything from what you give.
Remember way back when you were in love and it just tore you apart to be away from the other? You discussed marriage and all the children you would have and the perfect life together that nobody could tear apart. Nothing was more important. You just knew there would never be a day when you would argue over who does what chores, and who is sitting on their rear ends doing nothing while the other does all the chores.
Do something nice for your spouse because you love them and want them to be happy, not because you want something in return. And don’t keep score, it’s not a game to be won or lost. Believe me, your spouse knows the score as well as you do. Marriage is hard work, but remember — if you enjoy it, it’s not really work, is it?
2. Quitchur b… nagging
Men always talk about their wives nagging them into oblivion, but men can be just as bad, if not worse at times. Wives may nag about watching TV, dropping clothes on the floor, and working late. Husbands can nag about how much their wives spend at the store, or taking too long to get dressed for church, or whatever. What happens when the other nags? Yep, the brakes come on. Stop nagging!
If you would like to change your spouse’s behaviour, try to figure out what is causing it? The wife may have to also get the kids ready before she takes care of herself. The husband may work late because he’s trying to bring more money in. Try to determine if you are part of the problem and try to figure out a way to change or talk calmly with your spouse and come to an agreement.
3. Make sure brain is in gear before engaging mouth.
Think before you speak and try to listen to yourself before you actually open your mouth. Getting the last spiteful word in will not help fix anything, but instead make it all worse. You may think hurting your spouse will make you feel better, but it won’t. Keep unkind words inside and focus instead on positive discussion instead.
You can’t sit and just ignore what is bothering you, though, as this will just cause resentment. Instead, find a time when you both are calm and discuss the issues calmly and sensibly.
This is not a one-sided thing, either. Both parties must have the same desires for a wonderful and lasting marriage. Both should have a desire to see the other happy and content — and act on that desire often.
4. Sticks and stones…Word DO hurt
An abusive word is like a bullet fired from a gun — it cannot be recalled, and it will damage what it is aimed at. If you are short-tempered, you need to get it in check. Verbal abuse will definitely take its toll emotionally. Whoever wrote ‘sticks and stones’ was wrong. Words can and do hurt and the recipient will always remember them.
The person who is being attacked will resent the attacker possibly forever. Any abuse is bad, but some don’t see verbal abuse as being as bad as physical abuse. It is as bad if not worse. Just because you can’t see the bruises don’t mean they aren’t there. Continuing abuse will lead to divorce without a chance of reconciliation.
Respect your spouse. Love your spouse unconditionally. Do things for him without expecting anything in return.
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