morning porn

living in malaysia, we have pretty horrendous tv choices from either terrestrial or cable. it’s a re-run nightmare of crime, very old friends and other people’s bucket lists; because of this and to avoid the heavy editing and censorship at the cinema in a very conservative nationalist islamic state, we are quite dependent on the internet for current entertainment.

this morning my troll thru the latest torrents lists means having to scroll thru hundreds of newly added porn films and clips until i find something that is not porn, and still worth downloading.

there are many pitfalls, typing ‘bbc’ in a search for the latest from auntie beeb in the uk will of course throw up many films reflecting another meaning of the acronym, but still maybe including aunties.

titles themselves can be misleading, ‘the angry beavers’ is not a porn film, but ‘lost and found’ is; ‘the woodworker and woodturner’ is not but, ‘camp cuddly power-tool massacre’ is.

‘dog catcher’ ‘angry birds’ and ‘bad grandpa’ also sound like they might be but apparently are not.

‘meet the twins’ and ‘mother daughter lesbian lessons’ should clearly not be.

some just make me choke on my morning coffee, my favourite title yesterday had to be ‘mother blows best.’

it has to be pointed out that i am downloading, b.b.c.’s ‘ bees butterflies and blooms’ which almost could have been.