Eight (8) Simple Psychological Hacks to Win Friends and Get People to Like You.
So much blessing comes with having good people in your life
On November 15th, 2019, my parents were declared missing. This was the most terrifying event of my life.
Me alone in that situation would have been an absolute disaster.
Help came!
I had this guy named Akewe M.O. who became my strength, a help, and an absolute shoulder to lean on. He is the best friend anyone can ever ask for.
As you journey through life, you will realize that God shows up for us as mortal men.
Although they are rare, we have friends as good as gods. It is important that when we identify them. We do all we can to keep them.
Keeping a good person at any level of friendship doesn’t require an unachievable effort. For instance, you don’t do too much to keep a brother or parent. All you have to do is to establish an unbreakable bond and all other things are secondary.
This article aims to outline the various simple ways to win and keep a friend like Akewe M.O
#1. Give Cognizant to Friendship:
Because humans are emotional beings, there are need to remind people of their positions in our lives constantly.
Tell a friend today how you still recognize him or her as your bosom pal.
Acknowledge their presence. Acknowledge all that you both share and have.
#2. Readiness to help:
I once had a pediatric patient who was being managed for a particular hematological malignancy. The condition was already at the advanced stage and nothing could be done so much besides palliative care.
So much effort was made, however, she didn’t survive the end-stage condition.
I felt so bad about the patient's demise and was planning the break the bad news in the most polite way to the mother.
To my greatest surprise, the mother was so calm. Rather for my consolation, she started thanking me. She said she is aware of all our efforts and she is grateful for all our commitment.
This experience taught me that people don’t care so much about the outcome of your effort in their life rather they appreciate your willingness to help.
People don’t care how much you know but are concerned about how much you know.
#3. Honest constructive feedback:
I have said that the world is moving so fast and things are constantly changing. For this reason, everyone is in constant motion to move with the tides and catch up with their passional concerns.
Regardless, Akewe is one person who doesn’t care about what I feel when it comes to giving feedback. He reminds me of my background my dreams, and my new errors, and appreciates my growth as well.
We don’t need people who will sugarcoat the errors that they see in our lives. You need at least one person who can tell you the truth whenever you are walking the wrong path.
I have a couple of friends who will get them to proofread my documents and budget before I start execution. I trust them to give an honest feedback. This they do without any aim to demean or is courage my efforts.
Make efforts to be that one person that everyone feels safe
in an attempt to make people feel good and important, we end up telling lies and making people feel shy unnecessarily. There is no need for exaggerated compliments.
There are easy ways to give a compliment to a friend without sounding fake and superficial.
For instance:
Bro, I listened to your presentation yesterday it was truly amazing.
Your dress is beautiful, I can pay anything to have it
Where can I get this kind of hair? I like it.
#4. Pray for your friends:
This may sound too spiritual. Here is the truth, when everyone around your cycle is fine, it relieves everyone in the cycle of the extra burden of having to carry the weight of one another.
You owe your friends prayers and good wishes.
There was a simple prayer I prayed for Akewe after my parents were found. Here is it “ I pray that you will never have to go through the emotional trauma that I went through while searching for my parents”
As simple as it sounds, heaven bore me witness to this day, which was truly from my heart.
Don’t underestimate the power of prayers. It works for any level of friendship; whether courtship, marriage, business partners, boss at work, parents, children, or neighbors.
#5. Support their interest:
This is one of the coolest ways to win a friend. I have tried it over and over again. It hasn’t failed once.
People don’t care about how much you know until they know how much you care.
I wanted some help with one of my research topics a few years back. There was one consultant in public health who could me effortlessly. He is a very busy man to this day. I meditated trying to figure out how I could get him involved in my project.
Dr. David, I understand that you are a very busy fellow and you are known for your numerous research papers. Well, is there any project at hand that you will need some help? I’m here to help if only you will allow me.
Oh! Heaven, God indeed sent you here, please have your seat. Immediately he opened a folder and shared some manuscripts with me.
Before we were done with that project I had completed mine within the first 30 days.
People will allow you into their lives when they are convinced that you prioritize their interests.
Instead of begging people for their time, offer to assist them with their major concerns. They will be the ones calling you instead.
#6. Pay for someone launch:
I have met a couple of people at an eatery who randomly pay for my food. It might just be a casual thing for them to do, but to me, I saw those acts as being deliberate. It made me notice them wherever I saw them. It gives me the impression of so many possibilities:
They probably want us to talk,
7. Say hi first:
It feels good to me when people randomly just slide into my DM to say Hi. I know this one guy who has never failed to drop a message to me at the beginning of every new month.
Always greeting people first has a lot to say about you.
It’s a sign that you recognize and respect the individuals
It is a sign of kindness and friendliness
It makes you approachable to colleagues, neighbors, family, and members.
Wear a good perfume: wearing a good perfume is not for your comfort alone. It can bring good people around you and make people free and safe around you.
#8. Never judge people:
People often say “Don’t be too quick to judge people” I'm saying never judge people at all.
It’s a misplacement of priority to set aside your goals and start discussing the flaws of other people.
Oh yes! people act ridiculously insane. you do not influence the thoughts and behavior of others. But you can be selective with your thoughts.
Remember the words of Eleanor Roosevelt and I quote “Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people”
The contents of your conversation reveal the predominant state of your mind. This could either keep a friend or scare great minds away from you.
Your words and conversations are the fruits of your thoughts. Good people understand this and it influences their choice to stay with or run away from you.
final words:
In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit. Albert Schweitzer
