Say It Without Saying It, “You Want To Get Your Tubes Tied”

Being a woman is hard, but telling people you don’t want children doesn’t have to be. Some might not want to hear it and most will say “oh, you’ll change your mind” but you know what you want and there’s no need for debate. Let these five tips do the talking for you.

• Have a tube top tie-dying party and invite all your friends.
• Wear tube socks often and explain how you keep them in pairs by tying them together before putting them away.
• Throw a tuber-themed potluck, show up late and explain that you got “tied up” in the kitchen peeling yams.
• Explain how your reproductive system is nothing like the internet; an open series of tubes.
• Invite your friends to go tubing on the river. Suggest that it’s more fun if everyone ties their tubes together.