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Wow. I created an account for the sole purpose of saying how awful this “article” was and that I want my “4 min read time” back.

Sam Donsky is not nearly as funny or clever as he thinks he is. He’s not “that guy” on Deadspin either.

Winner of worst thing written and published on a website (keep in mind that this includes things that have been written and published about/by Trump on a website”):

“LOSER: Garrett Hedlund

Garrett Hedlund used to be dating Kirsten Dunst, but that’s no longer the case. Jesse Plemons is now dating Kirsten Dunst.

Let me explain. Previously, Garrett Hedlund dated someone. That someone was Kirsten Dunst. That relationship — Garrett Hedlund and Kirsten Dunst’s — is not happening anymore. Instead, Kirsten Dunst is dating Jesse Plemons.

Stay with me for a second. So, before all of this, there was a person: Garrett Hedlund. And Kirsten Dunst dated him. But then THAT STOPPED HAPPENING. And Kirsten Dunst started dating SOMEONE ELSE. Whom she continued to date. Called Jesse Plemons. And they are still dating now.

Does that make any sense at all? Sorry, I know it’s a lot.”

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