When I was a little girl,

Everyone asked me what I wanted to be

I'd say anything which I could hurl at that moment

And I know I said so many things

Where the only smile was fake and on my lips

When I grew up a little bit more,

I started considering my future, about what kinds of chores

Would interest me and how I'd like to spend the day before

I can go to bed with a smile, feeling it from my head to toe

And I did this and I did that

And I stayed confused for…

Palpitations: the word I'd use to describe you
It doesn't sound so great but the meaning comes through
I walk along and talk like I don't care as I dismiss a few
Chemicals building in my body as I press and hold in something true

So I quietly ask you, inside my head, stop me.
Maybe we could chuck the cafes and the the coffees
And run barefeet in a garden full of lillies
And you could make stupid faces and I could laugh silly

Or maybe we could just be in a Karan Johar movie
With flying costumes on abandoned…

As the night twinkled away in the absence of stars
Under the fairy lights illuminating my skin, my mind was at war
With myself, unhappy about how everything was going on
And in that moment, it felt as though, my will and my dreams were no longer strong

In that sweater weather with cold breeze around, I felt the fire in me quiver
As my mind started telling me all the reasons why I should give up
And I looked this way and that, but it didn't seem like anyone was coming to rescue
The dreams I dreamt in the middle of the…

You and I, we all have dreams and hopes and that spark in our eyes
And if you'd ask me why I dream my dreams, I don't think I'll be able to tell you why
All of them are against what I've been taught and they blatantly defy
Many lessons that stuck to the surface of my skin once upon a time

And I still wouldn't be able to tell you, why I dream my dreams
But I can tell you how majestic they make me feel, how supreme
The thought of that work and that effort inside my body
Seems like every…

There are more than 700 crore people on Earth
There are even more voices in their heads which treat them like dirt
There are so many amongst them who think there's no reason for their birth
And there are so many more who walk away, not having understood their worth

You're a human in the world today, I'll accept proving humanity is tough
You're a human in the world today, I'll accept uncountable things are rough
You're a human in the world today where a lot worse is associated with touch
You're a human in the world today, you've mostly seen something bad…

There was a time,
When waking up late in the night was a crime
When I could stubbornly cry and love would make everything mine
When the only records maintained were the grade card files
When it seemed like you had all the time to run miles and miles

Today, as I sit in the space between the past and the future,
There's a bitter sweet smile as I adore my life
For everything it has been so far and for how far we've come
Hand in hand, with space for laughter as sadness took some

And in this moment…

I am scared of water, and heights,
So, I'd always stay just a little away from all the beautiful sights
I get scared of what would go wrong or what just might
And so, I've always walked away without putting up a fight

I am scared of plummeting to death or even being hospitalized
I am scared of what it will come to, of what I'd have to sacrifice
So, I dwell on those thoughts and fear my imagination instead
Where I kill myself constantly, but still leave my fears unshed

In the quest to know myself, to find the…

I don't want to spew anger everywhere
My mind has just learnt to stay calm,
To duly process my voice, to shut my mind
For longer times, during my state of being alarmed

But. I don't think I want to stay calm, I don't think I can,
As rampant entitled assholes still walk freely calling it a trend
When they walk around holding some power they think is above my breath
How do I stay calm, as they enrage everyone with words that make no sense

When I don't laugh, they say I have no sense of humor
But there's nothing…

Chin up. Teeth out. Full smile.
Dear daughter,
That's the rule here that we follow by.
We smile our heart out and keep our spirits high
In the face of failure, at the foot of defeat
We work hard, and a little more and then we repeat

Chin up. Teeth out. Full smile.
Dear daughter,
That's what I have been taught since I was a kid
To be quiet and lovely, to show my grades for my grit
And so I tried and I was almost there too
Till things went astray, and well, I won't bore you.


Welcome to the real world. It sucks. You'll love it.
Monica and Rachel were only fictional till I was here.
House and home were all the same
Life outside academics could have very easily been put to shame.

This wasn't my house, but it gave me a home
This wasn't a map, but it had all the directions shown
This wasn't an adventure, but all the monotony was disowned
And well. I'm standing here now, I didn't know that this is how much I would have grown.

It was the first day and there were new faces everywhere
It was as…

Bhargavi Komanduri

Dil aur duniya ke beech, kahi khoye hue hai.

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