Eternity hasn’t made it leave.
It’s weird how you have dreams of the past from time to time. It’s good and bad at the same time. I’m sitting here on the balcony of a hotel watching the stars and lights. Europe is such a peaceful place and I feel at home here in Denmark. But enough of that.
“I had a dream about her again and I don’t even know why after 5 years.”
It was very vivid for me. I remember Lying on couch with her cuddling close and her voice whispering “I love you so much and I’ll never let you go”.
I know that sounds chezzy but I was 16 years old when it happened. I remember her face and the smell of her perfume. The smell of roses with lemon, how could I forget about that. Her long brunette hair with a purple bandana and cherry red lipgloss on her lips. It’s painful to even think of her now but I was dreaming that we were sitting on beach and holding each other close and I was about to kiss her when she said
“Baby I’m with someone”.
Then I woke up. It was heart breaking to think of her. You see we ended on a bad note. She hadn’t told me about her illness and I wasn’t a gentleman yet. I walked away from her and I regretted it until I realized it was for my own good.
She was a paranoid-schizophrenic that had medication for her episodes. Regardless I stuck by her side through it until the night she didn’t take her meds. Let’s just say that was the breaking point and the story is mine to keep. The last time I saw her we were sitting on the top of a hill in Himmel park. I remember having her confess her cheating and her true feelings about me and our relationship. This is cruel of me to say but when she begged me not to leave her I said
“I can’t be with someone who doesn’t love me for who I am and I can’t be with you because you used me”.
I walked away from her. I don’t know how she was feeling. Today it’s just a fading memory but I loved her for a period of time. I went through the letting go stage. I’m happy with my life now.
“I just don’t know why after all this time I have a dream about her and the time we shared together with our hearts beating as one”.
So ends this short story. I will never forget you Paige. You and I were young and crazy but it’s a part of history. That’s where I close the book on this chapter.