Billy Jones

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All you need to do is shout, “Wackemall” and everything will be better.

If you look at my about page you’ll only see the following “I’m just a retired long-haul trucker who exchanged his rig for pen, paper, and keyboard.” but there really is a lot more to me.

If you wish to cut to the chase and see what I’ve been writing…


I thought I might use the excess air to spin some sort of tiny turbine or windmill that generated electricity to light a low voltage light to indicate that everything was working as it should be working, but that never happened just like lots of things never happen.

Photo by Kyaw Tun on Unsplash

I remember back in 2014, working on a homemade aquarium pump to put air into a 300 gallon fish tank in my back yard. …


Photo by Timothy Dykes on Unsplash

Most of you remember Little Miss Muffet like this:

“Little miss Muffet she sat on her tuffet,
eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider who sat down beside her
And frightened miss Muffet away.”

But when I remember Little Miss Muffet it goes something like this:

Little Miss Muffet

Little Miss…


Photo by Max LaRochelle on Unsplash

I remember Daddy sending me out to turn the antennae after the rotor thingie died. We didn’t have cable back then, and didn’t see any need for it. If it weren’t for needing access to the Internet I wouldn’t have cable now.

Just a few years ago I walked into…


Double entendre? Perhaps. I’ll let you decide. Overtly sexual, perhaps a children’s poem, a nursery rhyme? Again, I’ll allow you to make up your mind. Thank you for reading, sharing, and supporting my efforts with your sweet gifts and lovely encouragements.

Photo by Daria Gordova on Unsplash

Sweet Lollipop

I’d like a lick sweet lollipop
there high upon a shelf,
but I can’t reach you on my own,
and none are here to help.
You are the sweetest lollipop.
You have to know it’s true,
but I can’t reach you lollipop.
Oh what am I to do?

I dream…


It’s hard starting over, but we try and try, chase and chase, and cry and cry…

Photo by Lodewijk Hertog on Unsplash

We play this game of cat and mouse,
you chasing me about the house
’til I am tired and mostly spent.
Then off you go, away you went.

You’re chasing me, I’m chasing you
like cats and dogs who never knew
the way to win, the way to play,
to chase again another…


Reminiscing about a prank I played on my employer many years ago.

One morning back when I worked for a local salvage yard, my boss and owner of the company said to me, “Billy, would you please replace the turn signal flasher in my Cadillac?”

It was an easy job anyone in Tom’s employ could have done as our core business…


Photo by Alexander Tsang on Unsplash

What’s an Internet spam factory, you ask? Actually you probably already know even if you’ve never heard the term before, and for those of you who need it spelled out, an Internet spam factory is a website where anyone can spew out products, or ideas that are of no value…


“…retailers are expecting major delays this year, and trucking companies have already announced increased shipping rates for December.” Better get those deals now.

Both stories are based on the classic theme — something has gone wrong and Christmas may have to be canceled if Santa can’t fix it in time. In The Reindeer Shoe a reindeer has lost one of the magic shoes that enables the reindeer to fly, and the little boy…


Don’t tell me you don’t like dogs, every body loves dogs. But sometimes, no matter how much you like dogs… Well perhaps you can relate…

Photo by Ruby Schmank on Unsplash

That Damned Dog

Sometimes in the evening
when I crawl into our bed
I turn to kiss your sweet sweet lips,
and stroke your pretty head.
As I fumble ‘neath the covers,
and reach to take your hand
there’s a feeling that comes over me,
I just don’t understand.

It’s that damned dog…

Billy Jones

I'm just a retired long-haul trucker who exchanged his rig for pen, paper, and keyboard. Read more at http://Wackemall.com

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