Can you not see it?
I honestly don’t know how else to describe it other than something on the inside of your chest just try to burst out. And no violently, but just applying tons of pressure until you give way and just let it come through. It’s so dangerous and it makes me want to do some god awful things, and it makes me feel god awful.
Like you can fantasise, and you daydream, and you imagine what will happen, but it just doesn’t help one bit. And it needs to stop. I need to stop.
I hate it, I hate it so much.