IS IT OKAY TO EAT BREAD? — YES IT IS OKAY TO EAT BREAD!

“three sliced breads on white ceramic plate” by Manki Kim on Unsplash

Hi, I’m Blandy and here’s my personal experience with bread.

Recently, I’ve noticed a lot of speculation about whether or not it’s a good idea to eat bread and if so, what the bread should be made of. These questions culminate to the point where it’s probably 67% of the topics shown on my Facebook feed.

Wow!

Not only does this make me very, very hungry but I start to feel incredibly anxious about the idea that I’m not in fact supposed to eat bread. I did read however, that you shouldn’t trust everything you read on Facebook, especially if you’re about to vote. Well, I’m not about to vote because I don’t know how, but I am about to tell you some things I learned about why you should indeed eat bread! Get ready for it!

Blandy’s Really Good Reasons for Eating Bread by Blandy Cobbles

1. Bread comes from our ancestors who knew that bread tasted good. If we weren’t meant to eat bread, our ancestors would have warned us about it earlier.

2. Bread can be toasted.

3. If you eat bread for every meal, you’ll gain access to the next level of the universe.

4. One time, when I was seven, my parents divorced and my dad took all of our belongings as well as all of our savings and my mom had to move us to a new apartment and she worked two jobs. I was pretty lonely after school until my mom brought home a loaf of bread for our usual morning toast. Instead of eating the bread like I was supposed to, I spent a lot of time getting to know the bread, watching Jeopardy with the bread and taking the bread to our neighborhood park where I played unsupervised. Eventually the bread got moldy as the sun was often beating down on it on the park bench, making the moisture from the bread grow spores faster than if I had just left it in the bread basket at home. In this case, I was better off eating the bread before I became emotionally attached to it.

5. Bread is good for seagulls.

These are just a few reasons why I can say that above all other things you read on the internet, what I have to say about whether or not bread is good for you is the most important. Yes, eat bread! Enjoy bread! Buy bread and do not watch evening programming with it, just toast it! Just so you know though, it’s not okay to eat butter so you need to eat it dry. Good luck!