A Pink Barrette And My Four-Year Old Son
Shannon Cofrin Gaggero

Yes, this right.

I remember being told, by my parents, friends, teachers: “You can’t.”

When they really meant, “you shouldn’t,” and conflated a problem of ability or capacity with a problem of morality. It’s confusing to a child.

All of our adult concerns about gender barriers are a way of pushing our moral dilemmas onto our children. Some of that is appropriate. Some moral choices are fraught. But gender is not a moral choice. We are attracted to certain kinds of people, we like who we like. How we dress doesn’t have a should or shouldn’t.

I have lots more to say about this, but I feel like I have taken enough of your platform already. Thank you for allowing us to read about your choices and your wonderful children.

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