1. Dress in your best black suit.
2. Go to the grocery store. Hunt the Cadbury Mini Eggs. When you find them, tower over the display.
3. Take your time observing the eggs. Say nothing. Let them feel the cold of your shadow.
4. Select a bag, but do not touch it. Sneer at the bag.
5. Bring your face close to the bag. Tell it how worthless it is. Let the bag feel your breath. Again, do not make physical contact.
6. Mutter: “The safeword is ‘Holstein-Friesian cattle.’”
7. Leave the bag and continue shopping.
8. Return to the…
My city took down a statue of Christopher Columbus last week, and I hear the Teddy Roosevelt statue outside New York’s Museum of Natural History is next. The removal of these artworks upsets me! How are we supposed to stop repeating the past if we don’t know our history?
Unfortunately, your city’s Christopher Columbus statue has not prevented history from repeating itself. And how could it? Columbus did not discover the country now known as the United States of America. Columbus technically wasn’t even Italian, since Italy was not founded as a nation-state until 1861.
My fiancé promised we wouldn’t use our wedding money to pay for his recent job loss due to the coronavirus. He is being very stubborn and refuses to go on unemployment. I can’t force him to, because if I try he will do the opposite of whatever I want him to do.
I just don’t know what to do. He was the breadwinner before the virus, and though I am still able to work, my salary isn’t much money.
As special and romantic a wedding may be, when two people are married they are forming…
On Monday, March 23, 26-year-old Lior Trestman attended a virtual meeting with Yale hospital representatives, Yale scientists, and the executive director of the New Haven Manufacturing Association. One item on the meeting agenda was how Trestman and others in the New Haven maker community could help produce medical face shields — crucial pieces of personal protective equipment (PPE) that were becoming nearly impossible to find in the Covid-19 pandemic. Yale received 1,000 newly minted and disinfected face shields the following Monday, March 30. …
Here is my dilemma. I have had a really hard time matching a foundation to my complexion color. Now that the beauty stores are closed, I have no one to tell me how to improve my choices. Am I wrong to think this is a very important matter?
You never know who you going to meet, and I want to look my best. Please advise as to where I can go for some help.
Dear Blotchy Babe,
No, you are not wrong to think of caring for your appearance in the age of Covid-19 as an…
How do you break up with someone?
Sick ‘n Tired
Dear Sick ‘n Tired,
Breakups are relatively simple — the difficult part is deciding the relationship is over. If you’re having trouble cutting ties, it’s possible you’re not ready to give up yet. Or maybe you’re not ready to deal with all that comes with a breakup. The unknown, the uncertainty, the prospect of dating again, the prospect of stepping into all that space another person once occupied.
If you are ready, I’d dare venture what better time to break up than during a global pandemic? There’s nothing like…
How can I prevent getting the coronavirus when I work at a grocery store and have to work every day with the public? How do I get my dirty coworker to actually wash his dirty hands?
Clean & Concerned at the Deli Counter
First of all, thank you for your public service. It’s taken until now for many people to realize how important your work is to everyone’s daily life. You deserve a huge raise, and I hope that you have enough time to rest and take care of yourself. According to the World Health Organization…
I like boardin’ jets, I like mornin’ sex (Woo!)
But nothing in this world that I like more than checks (Money)
All I really wanna see is the (Money)
I don’t really need the D, I need the (Money)
All a bad bitch need is the (Money)
- Cardi B, “Money”
I am a millennial woman who has dated many millennial men. The first few weeks of these relationships have usually gone like this: Man pays for first date. I offer to pay for second date. If my offer is refused, I suggest going Dutch. Man often accepts. …
photos by Michelle McLoughlin unless otherwise credited
Fred Linck hates fireworks, but on July 4th, 2018, he’s at Wilbur Cross High School in New Haven, Connecticut for the city’s impressive annual display. Thousands of people fill the school’s sprawling athletic complex, the red cliffs of East Rock Park and its signature 112-foot war memorial towering above the fields.
Fireworks trigger Linck’s post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Yet the 31-year-old former U.S. Marine and Westbrook, Connecticut native was at the Bridgeport fireworks the previous weekend, and he and his crew of campaign volunteers will be at two other displays over the coming…
Internet memelord Tank Sinatra made a cheeky post about now-Duchess of Sussex Meghan Markle a few weeks ago. Piggybacking off the royal wedding hoopla, he compared an old photo of Markle looking like a deer in headlights with one of her and Prince Harry beaming and newly betrothed, sans-serif-ly stating something along the lines of “Life without Bumble / Life with Bumble.”
While memes aren’t generally thought of as fountains of truth, this one came across a little sticky. Harry and Markle were set up by a mutual friend, and Tank is in a paid partnership with the Bumble dating…