Alright, ALL WRITE, I’ll Write!!! Regaining My Will to Creatively Write

Ashley Tillman
5 min readJan 7, 2024

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Hi, my name is Ashley. I have a problem.

It’s literally been YEARS since I’ve touched my beloved horror script (my creative baby). As I’m typing this, I let out an internal scream and cringe in embarrassment.

Let’s dive in.

You see, I am a full-time Writer/Editor (a scribe, if you will), and this script should’ve been completed EONS ago.

What gives???

Great question. Well, let’s backtrack. Though I did mention being a Writer/Editor, to better grasp my dilemma — it’s best to understand what type of writing I specialize in (i.e., do all the damn time).

Currently, I am a Technical Writer/Editor. In this role, I document, edit, and content manage various technologies, systems, processes, software/hardware, platforms, and information technology services for most of the day. This is grueling at times BUT like second nature to me.

That being said, let’s get back to that grueling part. I interact with various what you would/should call Subject Matter Experts (SMEs) to contextually capture these tech components. Depending on their schedule and availability, this could — and often does — take hours, days, weeks (not to mention weeks/months of revisions). This obviously doesn’t leave a lot of physical, mental, and emotional time for my dear, creative writing exploits. Tagging on that I’ve been tech or business writing/editing, and knowledge managing (as I am often expected to be a proxy guru at the overall knowledge maintenance, transfer, and lifecycle of the finish business or technical content/product) for around 20 years, and I’m under 40 years old. Now, you have a recipe for a creatively poisonous gumbo, of which the ingredients are:

1. Exhaustion (physical, mental, emotionally

2. Loss of inspiration (as it wasn’t sufficiently nourished)

3. Dwindling hours of the day

4. Writer’s block (DREADED, but at this point unavoidable)

So yes, ladies and gents, I’ve been chowing down on that creatively poisonous gumbo for too many years to count.

How could it get any worse?

SIDE NOTE: In the future, NEVER ask this question, it tempts the heavenly powers. And life will ALWAYS deliver.

Well, clearly, I didn’t listen. I asked the question. So, in comes life’s many trials, tribulations, and wins… Or as I always say,

Life be LIFE-ing.

For me, that looked like intensely beautiful revolution and moments of chaos. Think relationship breakups, moving, engagement/marriage, buying/selling a home, loss of a family member to suicide, college graduation, landlord losers, debt, surgery, pregnancy, loss of a child, home renovations, layoffs, grave parental illness, extended family issues, and deep spiritual reckoning. Not in that order, but WOWZERS, what a life (so far)!

Creative writing or passion writing is/was my outlet. Whenever, I felt a job was stiffing me, a manager was throwing me under the bus, a relationship of any nature was crumbling, and/or just feeling like someone was diminishing me — I’d pull out my laptop and get to typing up my draft script, play, and/or novel (yep, I have much unfinished creative writing content).

So effectively, creative writing devolved to be my warped therapy to deal with life’s overwhelming moments and phases that were often out of my control. It became my revenge pathway to regain my dominion and push back at haters, naysayers, diminishers, and anyone or anything that was making me feel small. Thus, in times of joy, I noticed I didn’t produce or finish ANY of my creative content. This is/was NOT particularly healthy.

Can I creatively write when I’m content, in times of happiness?

Rewiring my inspiration points for creative writing to truly regain the passion for it…

Well, one major way I’m actively falling back in a healthy love with creative writing and really re-nurturing it as my passion (and to birth my beloved horror script) is by observing creative content. It’s like a spark when you see other normies (non-famous, normal people) getting out there and doing it — and KILLING IT at their craft. On certain social media platforms, I follow fellow writers, scribers, documentarians, authors, bloggers, creative content managers, and non-mainstream creatives. It’s especially fascinating to see them chipping away at creative projects while maintaining a full-time, non-creative gig or career. They inspire me some for sure.

A more spiritual inspiration would be the Holy Bible. Before you groan, I won’t bother you with precepts and preaching. Not my place. I’m merely noting how my faith, cultivated by this holy text, which has gotten me through a lot of trials and tribulations (and shown me some extraordinary wins) — has also inspired my creative side tremendously. If you’ve ever read the good book, as it has been known as also, you can’t deny that it is so chalked full of wondrous stories that have captivated the world for centuries. It’s hard not to be inspired.

Thirdly, another avenue to positively position my mind to delve into more creative writing is just watching a good indie film. Whether that be a thriller, sci fi (my fav), horror (my other fav), historical fiction, romantic comedies (one’s that are easy on the corn), etc. Likewise, I glean inspiration also from scouring the pathways of Medium.com and other blog platforms. I suppose this type of content visually shows me that there are STILL interesting stories that need telling, or that my stories and issues are NOT too mundane to jot down (like now in this very blog posting).

I’m a sucker for a great indie movie. O, I can’t forget about the books!

Overall, these approaches and avenues are incrementally working in challenging me to really dig deep and create/produce.

Now’s a good time to finish that script. Thanks for reading! :)

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Ashley Tillman
Ashley Tillman

Written by Ashley Tillman

Ashley Tillman is an award-winning, certified Technology Writer/Editor transitioning into creative writing. She's the founder of Blue Geisha Documentation LLC.

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