Ha. Love it.
As I sit here in Washington/Dulles cringing about (yet another) flight delay, I am sitting next to “The Loud Gal” and her only-in-DC complaining about if “the commissioner” should be told about their “incompetent HR lead.” Volume on 11. Occasional swears. As I type this, she just yelled “woo hoo, woo hoo” so loud that even she realized it was apology time. To all of gate D11.
Note: I assume it is an iPhone, I dare not risk my ears long-term responsiveness by getting close enough to know for sure.
You stayed pretty on topic with business related travelers, but here are a couple family related travelers I have seen and have resembled from time to time. (Maybe you too?)
The Overwhelmed Parents: Children have them at the very edge of their sanity. The volume of their flock challenges The Loud Guy/Gal for ear piercing supremacy. They cut a path through the halls — in hurried fashion — which would make any driver subject to a field sobriety test. Belongings that are not left at security are strewn behind them randomly— hats, dolls, special blankets, iPads with cracked screens — and generally picked up by random strangers, who are either sympathetic or scared of hearing the screaming of a child when a cuddly friend is realized to be missing.
The “We Got This” Parents: A rarer, but oh-so-impressive breed. This family should only live in the “you’re not worthy” world of Pinterest. The children are so well behaved and polite, one can only assume they were born in a First Class cabin and were “Global Services” by Kindergarten. Bags are neat (and typically in better shape than mine), and somehow serve as chairs, when needed, without complaint. Headphones are sometimes adorned, with devices in hand. Often, they have cool, really hard to place accents. The parents don’t scorn the offspring of the Overwhelmed Parents, because they don’t even see them. They are in their own travel dimension that mere mortals can only aspire to.
If I wasn’t worried that my flight may actually depart sometime before midnight… we could talk about “The Save The World Parents” (trips always to somewhere you’ve only thought about going, with kids asking deep — and to some, super-annoying — questions) and the “I Never Thought We’d Fly Parents” to which everything is new and nerve wracking… and who are typically in the wrong line.
But I cannot close down without mentioning one awesome airport character. I have been guilty of being this guy, “The Free and Easy Guy.” He is an inevitable offshoot of the Overwhelmed Parents. As he is one. But this trip? This trip is his first business trip after traveling with his family. The world is his oyster. There are no blankies. He is unflappable.
Again, thanks for a reason to smile during my 15+ hours in airports today… which has only gotten me up the East Coast so far.
I’m close to becoming some new and very bad traveler type, very bad indeed…