Yesterday I went to the barber shop. Soon after sitting down, the man cutting my hair took control of the music and played a song from a band I’d never heard of. I don’t remember their name.

BOBBY: I’ve never heard of them before.

BARBER: They’re old, man. From the 90s. Like ‘95.

BOBBY: Ah, 1995. The year of Speed.

BARBER: (laughs)

BOBBY: Oh wait, that was ‘94. Speed was the best thing to come out of 1994.

BARBER: Shit, man. How old are you?

BOBBY: 28.

BARBER: You were into speed?

BOBBY: Well, my aunt and uncle were cool.

BARBER: Oh shit. (laughs) Well I’m gonna play Huey Lewis and the News next. The entire Sports album is about cocaine.

At this point I realized we were talking about two different speeds and transitioned into a dialogue about American Psycho.