names
I’m going to talk about names, titles, tags, handles, brand, pseudonym, aliases and how I got mine!
Funny thing about names, you don’t get to pick them,
ever and when you do it’s weird, there almost always picked for you.
from the day you’re born; John, Joe, Shmoe. Tell the day you die; Old Dumb Sack of Shit, Grandpa, Nobody. Names are literal badges picked by the people who know you.
When I started writing this project, the first thing that hit me was I don’t want to use my real name. But I didn’t want to pick one either that would be odd for me. I wanted a name that I've been called before something that describes me in one word.
I think it was Monday.
Actually I don’t I remember what day it was, but for all intents and purposes it can literally be any day you want, I could’ve woken up on a Sunday but you know what, i’m gonna make up a day in the week cause why not.
It was Wythday
I could hear my family talking in my sleep, I thought “it’s a dream” but I woke up and the conversation seemed to have continued from my dream to the downstairs kitchen. If remember correctly they were talking about how my brothers and I turned out to be. The youngest one was there and he’s known for being quite foul so i’m just going to call him *** for now. So *** and my parents were first talking about my middle brother, he has a temper although it’s actually quite calmed down over the years but personally I don’t think he has a temper I just think he’s sensitive & insecure. I’m going to call him Danny by his actual name, I like Danny. So *** and company are ragging on Danny about his weight and his lack of motivations to do sports instead taking interest towards music. Danny could take down a fucking bear if he wanted to, he’d be great in sports but personally I think he’s a better musician.
*** and company disagree which is fine, can’t really blame them when you got a sixteen year old son who has the strength to take down grown men, I can imagine being frustrated when he wants to play the drums instead. They Eventually got to me which is nothing new usually when the theme of discussion is “losers in the family” Daniel and I are go to`s.
Fine nothing new.
But this time it kind of struck a chord with me, well every time they talk about me being a loser It strikes a chord with me but something was different. Enough so for me to remember and write about it years from then. *** started it off with, if I was going to ever go back to school or do something with my life. For some reason it’s always that very run of the mill stuff “observing what you're lacking instead of what you got” kind of thing.
They agreed and replied.
“Yeh and why does he lie so much”
I gotta say when I heard that come from my mom it wasn’t really shocking but it just kind of hurt. My father and *** went on and talked about how I was untrustworthy and how I could literally be doing anything and they wouldn’t know because i’d lie about it. Which was very true. They went on and said how I lie about everything, when I tell stories I exaggerate things to come off as funnier. Which was also true. So you might be asking why are you hurt if they’re saying things you already know. I was hurt because they were true. My parents most of the time spoke in Spanish, my brothers and I in English and we all understand Spanish just fine. Don’t know why we can’t fucking speak it, seems kind of dumb when we can understand every word spoken in Spanish but can’t speak it. So a lot of conversations tend to be spoken half in English half in Spanish.
So after awhile I started tuning out, I already heard the extent of where they were going.
From there one word kept ringing in my head.
Hablador.
My Mom and Dad kept saying it with a sort of disgust. Like when the dog shits on the floor or when they eat food that’s too sweet. They always said the first part of the word like an exhale
HA
Then the second part would sound identical to blah, then door with the “r” rolling. I kind of liked the word the way it sounded and what it meant even with its bad connotations. I liked that the actual meaning of the word means talkative but when used informally it means liar. It kind of sums me up good and bad. I love to talk, don’t know why but I like doing it and I like to tell stories be it true or false and I tend to lie a lot, I’m not perfect.
Personally I don’t think people should pick their names I believe people should adopt them overtime when they find who they are.
And personally
I couldn’t ask for a better name.
