Questions To Learn Your Childs Love Languages

Susanna Colleen
5 min readJul 1, 2024

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Calling parents of kids seven and older to join me!

As a parent, understanding your kids’ love languages is essential for building strong connections with them. By asking thoughtful questions and paying attention to their reactions to different gestures of love, you can discover how they best receive affection and care. Discovering their love languages enables you to tailor your interactions to make them feel truly cherished and understood. By delving into this topic further, you can reveal the key to nurturing deeper relationships with your children and fostering a sense of security and love within your family dynamic.

Key Takeaways

• Observe how they express affection.

• Notice their reactions to different expressions of love.

• Engage in activities they enjoy together.

• Pay attention to what makes them feel loved.

• Consider taking a love language test together.

Physical Touch

When it comes to understanding love languages in parenting, physical touch plays an essential role in expressing affection towards your child. Pay attention to how your child responds to physical contact. Does your child seek hugs, cuddles, or holding hands? These gestures can convey love and security. During family activities, observe if your child gravitates towards physical closeness.

Engage in activities that involve physical touch, like playing sports together or simply snuggling on the couch. Notice how your child reacts to your physical presence and affection.

To better understand your child’s love language, consider how they respond to different forms of physical touch. Some children may feel most loved when receiving hugs, while others may prefer gentle pats on the back. Take note of your child’s reactions and comfort levels with various types of physical contact.

Your Child May Speak This Love Language If…

  • They ask for hugs or kisses frequently
  • When they are sad, they would rather be held than speak about their issues

Acts of Service

Consider how acts of service can play a significant role in expressing love to your child by actively engaging in tasks they appreciate. Observing your child’s reactions to your help with chores or willingness to assist them in activities they enjoy can provide valuable insights into their love language.

Offering to prepare their favorite meal, assisting with school projects, or simply lending a helping hand when needed can speak volumes to a child who values acts of service as a form of love.

Take note of how your child responds when you offer your assistance. Do they light up when you help them with a task, or do they show appreciation through their actions? By observing these reactions, you can better understand how acts of service resonate with your child and incorporate them more intentionally into your interactions.

Your Child May Speak This Love Language If…

  • They ask for help to learn a new skill
  • They look for your guidance in working on a project for school

Words of Affirmation

Observing your child’s response to verbal compliments and positive affirmations can offer valuable insight into their preferred love language. Pay attention to how they react when you say things like ‘I love you’ or ‘I appreciate you.’ Notice if they light up, become more confident, or seek reassurance when praised.

Writing down affirming words in cards or notes and cheering them on at sports games can also help gauge their receptiveness to words of affirmation.

During interactions with your child, make a conscious effort to use encouraging language and express your love verbally. Take note of how they respond to your affirmations and whether they seem to thrive on positive words.

This can guide you in understanding if words of affirmation resonate deeply with them as a primary love language.

Your kiddo may have this love language if they:

  • Seek affirmation that they are loved
  • Ask if they look nice today.

Gifts

Explore how tangible gifts play a significant role in making your child feel appreciated and loved. Your child may value receiving gifts as a way of expressing love. These gifts, whether big or small, serve as tokens of appreciation and recognition for them.

Pay attention to how your child responds to surprises and thoughtful presents. Do they light up with joy when presented with a gift? Are they excited to unwrap something special? Observing their reactions can provide insights into their love language.

Consider incorporating gift-giving moments into your interactions with your child. Whether it’s a small token of appreciation or a thoughtful gesture, these gifts can convey love in a tangible way. Notice how your child perceives these gifts — are they cherished and valued?

Encouraging your child’s love for gifts can strengthen your bond and show them that you understand their unique way of feeling loved. Remember, the thought and effort behind the gift can hold as much significance as the gift itself in conveying love to your child.

Your Child May Speak This Love Language If…

  • They look for rewards over hugs
  • They hope to be recognized with presents over attention

Quality Time

Engage your child in focused and enjoyable activities to strengthen your bond through quality time spent together. Take the opportunity to plan special moments where you can connect with your child without distractions. Whether it’s a game night, a nature walk, or a baking session, make sure to give your child your undivided attention.

Notice how they respond during these moments. Are they seeking physical touch, like hugs and snuggles, or do they express love through acts of service by helping out during the activity? Pay attention to their reactions when you spend one-on-one time with them or give them a small gift. These observations will provide valuable insights into your child’s love language preferences.

After spending quality time together, consider reflecting on these experiences and maybe even taking a love language test together to further understand how your child perceives and expresses love. By prioritizing quality time and being present in these moments, you can create lasting memories and strengthen your relationship with your child.

Your Child May Speak This Love Language If…

  • They ask for more solo stories at bedtime
  • They make attempts to seek out your attention

Conclusion

By asking questions and observing your kids’ responses, you can gain insight into their love languages. Engaging in activities that resonate with their preferred ways of feeling loved can strengthen your bond and create meaningful connections.

Taking the time to learn and cater to their unique love languages shows your children how much you care for and appreciate them. Plus, it will be a huge confidence booster to show your kid how much you love them in their love language!

Join me on this!! I’ll let you know how it goes at the end of the week!

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Susanna Colleen

Aiming for all things parenting to help you in your journey. Probably going to be some making money online, and reviews in the process.