Retrospective: 2019

Photo by NordWood Themes on Unsplash

Each year, I try to look back at the previous months, and reflect on what the year was like. Every year is different, but one thing always remains the same: a pattern emerges. A few major topics can be used to summarize the year, and the trials and tribulations of the previous twelve months. 2019 was by far one of the most tumultuous years I’ve lived through, and certainly had its ups and downs; and they were extreme.

Other Year-End Reviews

• To see a summary of what I watched this year, see my Trakt.tv year-in-review.
• To see a summary of what I read this year, see my Goodreads year-in-review.
• To see an overview of how much I read in Pocket this year, click here.

Death

By far, the most profound effect 2019 had on me was the death of my father. Though he had been suffering from dementia for the past three years, his passing came rather suddenly. He was sent to the hospital on October 18th, where we shared his wishes with the doctors to not be treated. He wished to be kept comfortable and allowed to pass away peacefully, so we moved him to hospice, knowing that it was a matter of days before he would pass. We were therefore incredibly surprised the very next morning when we received the call that he had passed away. We had told him the day before that we were going to let him go, and that we would be okay. I believe he heard us, and knew that it was okay for him to surrender himself so he could make his way to Heaven. It was a mercy to him and everyone who loved him that he had finally found peace. Of course, the next days were spent grieving, and preparing his services. Fortunately, all the arrangements had been pre-made a couple of years ago, so the stress of that was far less than it could have been. He had a beautiful service on October 26th, including military honors. It was also an opportunity for my brother, Don and I to bond and share some time together. He was here from October 24th to the 27th.

Losing my father was one of the most profound moments of my life. Unfortunately, I lost him slowly, and couldn’t really have conversations with him for the last couple of years of his life — that was the hardest part. I wrote and delivered a eulogy at his funeral — something I felt compelled to do; I believe it was cathartic for me. He will be missed, and never forgotten though; his memory lives in me every single day.

Mom

Of course, Mom was heavily impacted by Dad’s death. She also had her fair share of stress this past year. On March 14th, she had gastric bypass surgery, which she had been preparing for the entire year before. This surgery was by no means minor, and involved a hospital stay in the ICU. She was finally released to come home nearly a week later on March 20th. She celebrated her 62nd birthday on May 7th. I was out of town at the time, but we went out a few days later to celebrate. She had a couple more procedures throughout the year, trying to deal with different issues, but on August 7th, we ended up in the ER when her stomach was hurting her severely. It turns out she had a bowel trapped in one of her hernias, and required emergency surgery. She had that surgery on August 8th, and was released from the hospital a couple days later on the 10th. Since then, her health has been poor, and she ended up in the ER again on October 19th — the same day Dad passed — with weakness and extreme lethargy. She was admitted overnight for observation.

Before that last trip, Mom was already having a lot of trouble getting around at the house — the stairs were especially difficult for her. With Dad’s passing, we decided it was time for her to move to an assisted living facility, so she could get around easier, and have the care she needs, and so she could maintain her dignity in the event of falls, or needing help with showers, etc. Mom found an incredible place called Atria of Cy-Fair, and we moved her there on November 2nd. Since then, she has been getting physical therapy and occupational therapy multiple times per week, and has regained some of her strength. She’s also more comfortable there, I think, which are all steps in the right direction.

Jenny

Jenny also had her run-ins with death this year. In addition to helping me through my father’s death, her uncle Kevin passed away on July 14th. His funeral followed on the 27th. On the flip side of that though, Jenny started kickboxing classes on June 28th, and continues to attend them multiple times per week. As a result, she has lost weight, and is routinely gushing about being able to wear some clothes she wasn’t comfortable in previously. I must admit surprise that she has continued going every week, but she seems to enjoy it, and that’s what matters most. Her great-aunt Pat also passed away on December 20th, losing an unknown battle with cancer. We attended her funeral on December 28th.

She did have a bit of a health thing this year, needing an emergency root canal in January, then a bout of cluster headaches from June 4th to the 8th. We nearly had to take her to the emergency room, but they finally subsided after the 5th day of crippling pain.

Photography

As for myself, 2019 really encompassed a change year for me, as I went all-in on photography this year, turning it from a hobby into an actual business. On January 5th, my best friend Matt and I went to Galveston for a photoshoot, where we had a very specific shot in mind. This was the first of our ‘monthly’ photo shoots we had planned for the year. We both got some excellent shots on this trip, which would come into play a bit later in the year. On January 16th, Matt and I submitted photos to an exhibition competition to be showcased at the WPPI expo in Las Vegas. Matt submitted one from this photo trip, while I submitted one I took while in Ireland. Matt and I had *very* similar photos to the one he submitted. On February 4th, our photos were selected to be exhibited! Mine would appear digitally, while Matt’s was being printed for display. Since this exhibition was in the United States, and we were both being featured, we made the decision to attend in person, and booked our trip on February 6th. We would travel to Las Vegas on February 26th, and return home on March 2nd.

As a result of my photography seemingly taking off and being recognized, I was determined to make a go at it. On February 1st, I bought my first full-frame mirrorless camera, the Sony A7R III. The very next day I bought my first full-frame lens. Over the course of the year, I would invest in some significant equipment, all of which has made me a far better photographer than I was even a year ago. I redesigned by BKB Designs logo, revamped my website (more than once) to focus on photography, and spent a significant amount of my time this year focused on photography, and photography business-related work. Throughout the year, I bought a total of four full-frame lenses: the Tamron 28–75mm f/2.8; the Sony 50mm f/1.8; Sony 70–200mm f/2.8; and the Samyang 14mm f/2.8 ultra wide lens. I also picked up a 2x teleconverter for my Sony telephoto lens that effectively doubles it to a 400mm lens. I also invested in a speed flash, strobe, backdrops, reflectors, and many other photography-related items, and now have a complete mobile studio that I can use for portraits, headshots, etc.

On February 2nd, Matt and I did our monthly shoot in downtown Houston. We did a lot of walking, and weren’t very happy with the conditions, but salvaged it by sticking it out until it started raining. After the rain though, we got some of our best photos ever. It was my first shoot with my new camera, and I was thrilled with the results.

Beyond the monthly photo shoots with Matt, I had a few ‘clients’ this year. On March 30th, I took the first set of senior portraits of Jenny’s cousin Alburey, followed by a second set on April 6th. We still have one more set to take, once the weather turns a little bit nicer. On April 21st, I took some family photos for a friend, which turned out nicely. In June, I took my own head shots, at home, while testing out my lighting equipment. I took a professional one, one for social media, and another for my website. Overall, I’m happy with how they turned out. I actually started making money with my photography in July, by taking photos of a house for a real estate agent, who happened to be one of my best friends in high school, Matt Mitchell. A few days later, on July 24th, I took photos of his home, which he was putting up for sale, and was hired by his wife and did photos on November 27th for a house she had listed. I also was contacted on August 26th by the Landry’s company about using one of my photos for their website. They didn’t respond to my request for payment, however, so they lost out on that opportunity. My photos are far better than what they have on their website.

Matt and I also ran into quite the situation on September 28th while scouting photo shoot locations. We checked out the former DB Cooper’s Mansion in Spring, which was an abandoned and stripped-out building. While there though, we apparently got in the way of a drug deal, or robbery, and just nearly-escaped danger. It was quite the adrenaline-inducing moment. As a result, we’re far more careful in the locations we go for photos now. We kept this in mind on October 12th, when we finally did our ‘Mustang’ photo shoot. We found an absolutely amazing industrial location, and took his and Jenny’s Ford Mustangs out for photos, and did some light painting (learning a lot in the process.)

I challenged myself to post a daily photo during the month of November. I’m happy to say that I was successful in posting something every single day, and I’m pretty happy with the results. I also attended a boudoir photo workshop on September 12th, where I got some nice photos, and made some good connections. Matt also attended, and later did a couple of photo shoots with one of the models we met there. We have another one scheduled for the first weekend of January.

Jenny and I attempted to do a photo exploration trip, when we went to Hermann Park, and the Japanese Tea Gardens on February 16th. I got two of my favorite photos of the year there, but I think it was too much walking for Jenny; we haven’t done another photo tour since (with the exception being our travel.)

I kickstarted my first-ever product this year on May 27th, which was the Peak Design Travel Tripod. I should be receiving that sometime soon, as they have started shipping out to backers.

Travel

Lately, we have enjoyed traveling quite a bit, and we traveled more in 2019 than most previous years. We had planned a trip to New York City as our big trip this year, and enjoyed a week in the Big Apple from May 18th to May 25th. It was a great trip, but was my third of the year by that point.

From February 26th to March 2nd, Matt, his wife, Christen, and myself were in Las Vegas attending the WPPI Expo, where Matt and I had photos on display. It was a fun trip, and included a visit to the Hoover Dam on March 1st.

I traveled to Chicago for a quick business trip from May 5th to 8th. That trip also included a drive to Milwaukee, where my team and I attended a Milwaukee Brewers baseball game. That was a lot of fun, and a great team-building event. There are still punch-lines and nicknames from that trip.

We took advantage of another work-related trip to make our first visit to California! We left on August 14th for Rocklin, CA, where I worked the following day, then spent a 3-day weekend in San Francisco, where we saw some of the sights, and took a day-trip out to Yosemite National Park, which was incredible; definitely a place I’m going to have to return to. I also lost my cellphone on that trip, though was fortunate that a wonderful person, also named Brad, returned it to me. We returned home from that trip on August 19th.

Lastly, Jenny flew to Las Vegas in November for her cousin Karly’s 21st birthday celebration. That was a quick trip, with her leaving on the 21st, and returning on the 24th.

With all of the traveling we did this year, and the traveling we’d like to do in the future, we decided to enroll for TSA Pre-check, and avoid some of the hassles of traveling. Unfortunately, that didn’t work out for Jenny’s trip in November, as she was unable to use Pre-check for both legs of her trip. I’ll be interested to see if I get to enjoy the benefits of it on my next trip.

Matt and I also booked our trip back to Las Vegas in February, 2020 for the next WPPI Expo. After attending this year, and meeting some great new friends, we’ve decided to make it an annual trip. This time, it’ll just be Matt and I, so we’ll be focusing exclusively on photography, and participating in some of the photo walks, and classes, as well as attending more of the actual expo.

Confrontations

2019 contained some strange situations, and confrontations, which all seemingly stemmed from rather minor things:

On March 2nd, when I was returning from Las Vegas with Matt and Christen, I had Jenny come to the airport to pick me up. I was tired and ready to get home. When leaving the parking garage, the machine ate our ticket, and we had ‘difficulty’ with the attendant, which nearly resulted in her calling the police on me. It’s a story better told in person, but suffice it to say that Jenny thought I was going to go to jail.

On July 6th, Jenny and I went to Space Center Houston, looking forward to a special tour they had for the classic Mission Control, setup to replicate how it looked during the Apollo Moon Missions. Unfortunately, poor crowd control, poor management, and extreme heat led to one of the worst experiences Jenny and I have ever had. We complained, though were far from the first to do it, and got our money back. But we vowed never to return to Space Center Houston again. It’s a shame, too, because they have some exhibits I would have liked to see and take photos of.

On October 11th, another run-in with a disgruntled woman led to an intersection confrontation in which a woman in scrubs was screaming at me, and I was screaming at her. It involved a power outage, 4-way stops, and bad days. The positive outcome of these situations is the fantastic stories we get to tell people about them.

Miscellaneous

I realize a lot of this seems like nothing good happened this year, but that’s not true. Other than my photography, plenty of other good and random things happened throughout the year as well:

• 1/1 — My annual New Year’s Day tradition of going to the Galleria and buying the latest LEGO modular building.
• 1/8 — Took Kirby to the vet for vomiting. She got an anti-nausea shot, and was fine after that.
• 1/16 — Had Jury Duty. Nearly got selected to serve, but ultimately, did not.
• 2/9 — My evil plan to convert Matt to Apple products finally came to fruition, when he got his iPhone and Apple Watch. I tagged along to laugh maniacally in the background.
• 2/22 — Had to exchange my work laptop at the Microsoft Store because of issues it had.
• 2/23 — Took Mom to Hickory Hollow, which I hadn’t been to in about 20 years. It was pretty much exactly the same as it was the last time I was there.
• 2/27 — Launched my new website, focused exclusively on photography. • 3/31 — Switched from Verizon to T-Mobile for phone service. Saved a considerable amount of money by doing this, and am mostly happy with the results.
• 5/26 — Celebrated my 40th birthday.
• 6/27 — Signed up for Wix and moved my business website to that platform. I also retired all my other websites upon doing so.
• 7/24 — Hung the first large-format print of my photography in our living room. It is a photo of St. Patrick’s Cathedral from our trip to NYC.
• 8/3 — Attended an Astros game, which turned out to be special. Not only was the Astros Hall of Fame induction weekend, where a huge number of Astros legends were present, but Astros pitching combined for a no-hitter in that game. It was my first-ever no-hitter I was in attendance for.
• 8/20 — Attended my 2nd Astros game of the year with my friend Jacob, with great seats right behind the bullpen, and we won the game.
• 9/1 — Watched the final innings of Justin Verlander’s 3rd-career no-hitter on television. That was quite something to see.
• 9/20 — Got the iPhone 11 Pro Max, which has an amazing camera system, and even better battery life.
• 9/21 — Upgraded my home computer setup a bit, by replacing my monitor with a 32” 4K UHD monitor. Once color calibrated to match my laptop, this was a huge change to my desk setup, both for work and home.
• 9/21 — Finally bought the Nintendo Switch, mostly for Jenny. It’s been a neat game console, and Jenny plays it a lot.
• 10/11 — My doctor at last put me on cholesterol medications, after I told her I’d done what I was going to do to improve my diet. We’ll find out in January if it’s helping at all.
• 10/17 — I switched to a new CPAP mask, which I like MUCH better, is far more comfortable, and works better than my previous ones.
• 10/30 — The Astros lost Game 7 of the World Series, which was a huge disappointment to fans. On the bright side, the Washington Nationals won their first-ever World Series title.
• 11/8 — Attended a comedy show of Josh Wolf, a comedian who’s been making the rounds on YouTube. He was hilarious, and it was a lot of fun.
• 11/11 — Got a 90-minute massage, in an attempt to relieve stress. It worked for about an afternoon.
• 11/23 — Attended a LAN party at Matt’s house for a few hours, before having to return to obligations and life in general. Still, it was a fun distraction.
• 11/29 — Jenny and I went to the Renaissance Festival for the first time in a few years. The weather wasn’t ideal, and we didn’t stay long. It’s not as enjoyable as it once was, and we probably won’t be going back anytime soon. We want to try the Sherwood Forest Faire near Austin next year, in hopes it will be more fun.
• 12/8 — Saw my nephew Josh get his first puppy, whom he named Apollo.
• 12/21–1/1 — Jenny and I took a very well-deserved vacation from work.
• 12/22 — Saw Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, closing out the Skywalker Saga.
• 12/25 — Hosted Christmas at our home, for Jenny’s immediate family. I got a new Kindle, AirPods Pro (which are incredible), and a customized Astros jersey, along with gift cards, some clothes, and a few other goodies.

Busy-ness and Stress

By far, 2019 was one of the busiest, most stressful years I’ve lived through. Nearly every single weekend throughout the year contained some type of activity, planned event, or obligation. I can count on one hand the number of weekends we just stayed home and lounged around. As a result of being so busy, my stress level was considerably more than previous years. Part of this comes from work, and the inevitable stresses that causes, but the majority of it came from life events, and lack of free time. By having so many things that needed to be done, true leisure time was a rare commodity for me. I look forward to getting a little bit more of that in the future — hopefully.

Entertainment

I saw fewer movies in the theater this year than normal:

• Avengers: Endgame — May 4th
• Men In Black: International — June 21st
• Spider-Man: Far From Home — July 13th
• The Lion King — July 21st
• Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker — December 22nd
• Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker — December 30th

2019 saw series finales of many of my favorite TV shows, which is always bittersweet:

• The Big Bang Theory (CBS)
• Silicon Valley (HBO)
• Game of Thrones (HBO)
• Suits (USA)
• Ballers (HBO)
• Veep (HBO)
• Elementary (CBS)

My favorite shows on TV this year varied wildly:

• *After Life — Season 1 (Netflix)
• *Atypical — Seasons 1, 2, & 3 (Netflix)
• *Barry — Seasons 1, 2, & 3 (HBO)
• *Big Mouth — Seasons 1, 2, & 3 (Netflix)
• Chernobyl (HBO)
• The Expanse — Season 4 (Amazon Prime)
• The Handmaid’s Tale — Season 3 (Hulu)
• Jack Ryan — Season 2 (Amazon Prime)
• Killing Eve — Seasons 1, 2, & 3 (BBC America)
• *The Mandalorian (Disney+)
• Mindhunter — Season 2 (Netflix)
• *The Morning Show (Apple TV+)
• The Orville — Season 2 (Hulu)
• *See (Apple TV+)
• Star Trek: Discovery — Season 3 (CBS All Access)
• Stranger Things — Season 3 (Netflix)
• This Is Us — Seasons 3.5 & 4.0 (NBC)
• Unbelievable (Netflix)
• Watchmen (HBO)

*Denotes shows I started watching this year.

Summary & Looking Ahead

So as I look back at this year, and all of its ups and downs, it was a mixed bag, really. The downs were some of the lowest I’ve had in a long time, while the ups were some of the most rewarding ones I’ve had in a long time. More than anything, I felt the stress of life’s responsibilities more acutely than normal. Losing my Dad was difficult, though the past few years had prepared me for it. In many ways, he was already gone, since I couldn’t really have a conversation with him anymore. But it was still hard. It was emotionally taxing, and nearly brought me to the breaking point. There were multiple times this year that I wondered if I would suffer a nervous breakdown, only to step back from the brink and pull myself together. I probably should look into some therapy though.

Looking forward to 2020, I’m not very sure what the future holds. I have some immediate plans, such as attending WPPI in February, and then possibly having carpal tunnel surgery at some point after that. Beyond those things though, Jenny and I haven’t decided on our 2020 trip yet. We had briefly toyed with the idea of going to Disney World, but the impending launch of their Star Wars hotel in 2021 made us delay that until then. We’ve talked about a trip up the California coast, or a trip to Scotland, but both of those are likely too long and expensive to contemplate just yet.

We’ve discussed moving to a new house — something a little larger, to accommodate my photography and LEGO addiction. But that’s a major step, and not something we’re quite ready to commit to just yet.

The only thing I’m sure of for 2020 is that it will continue to provide challenges. I’ll overcome them, as I always do — but it would be nice if it was a bit less stressful than 2019.