Why I don’t want my daughters to join a sorority
Jules Taggart
18124

Wow. I don’t agree at all. I learned leadership and how to stand out, how to speak in front of a group, how to organize and run a large group, which in turn led me to become a good manager of people, time and resources. Those skills have taken me much farther than my degrees. My sorority also had women of all types and colors- back in 1994. I knew women who couldn’t afford dues and we had ways to help that. Plus, a ton has changed over the years. You addressed some of that, but clearly aren’t involved to see just how much has changed. Or maybe, in this area the South has led the pack? I doubt it tho, because I see pictures daily of the women who’ve recently joined and they are more diverse than ever. 
I will say, that the most hurtful thing I was ever told was by someone at church when I walked in after rush- that I shouldn’t be there since I was now in a sorority. I wasn’t even welcomed to my church that I’d grown up in. I never did get back involved after that comment. What’s more, it was by someone I’d been friends with for years. Clearly it still bothers me. The judgmental people who really have no idea what it’s like.

I had a ton of friends who weren’t Greek- I didn’t date fraternity guys (nothing against them, just dated one guy who wasn’t in one). I had friends in several different sororities. I learned more about fundraising and doing for others through my sorority than I ever did in church. This article just rubs me the wrong way, especially knowing how it helped me grow in so many ways. It’s certainly not for everyone and I’m fine with that. But that doesn’t mean it makes women become smaller. That’s completely the opposite of the truth and experience that I had. There’s no way I’d be where I am today without those experiences.

As for some of the things you said, especially about recruitment- totally false. I was a Recruitment Chair for my sorority. We kneeled for several reasons- first, because there was not enough room for all of our Potential New Members and for all of use to have chairs. Wouldn’t you kneel rather than have your guest kneel? Standing while speaking to someone who is sitting is the real power move- would you have preferred that? Secondly, we rotated so that several people would be able to meet one another. Not having to worry about the noise of scooting chairs back and forth makes kneeling a much better alternative. We never held up numbers behind our backs- even the PNMs would have seen that! We did have a signal in case we got stuck and had a hard time finding common ground with or carrying on a conversation. It was to have a more senior member help us. That always made me feel like a failure if I couldn’t carry on the conversation. At 19 years old, it was sometimes difficult, but the senior members would come in and help. I learned a ton about how to carry on a conversation with a complete stranger by listening to them and then being able to do this myself.

Most people who have commented on this so far were not in a sorority and have only “heard” or “seen” things. Shame on us if we still judge people by what we have seen or heard and not by what we have actually experienced. I could go on and on, but I have a ton of work to do on my two businesses. Businesses I would not have learned the skills to run and manage if not for the amazing things I learned while being in one of those terrible sororities. Maybe take it off your Link’d-In page if it’s so horrible.

Like what you read? Give Brandi Paine a round of applause.

From a quick cheer to a standing ovation, clap to show how much you enjoyed this story.