I thought to myself, why not write a completely speculatory article like every other media outlet?

1. iOS 8 notifications with actionable buttons will be the most life changing thing to ever happen to your wrist.

With two buttons on every notification, it seems more likely that these are designed for quick access from a device on your wrist. However, with the current design—a side-by-side format on the lock and home screen—it seems like a more logical orientation to have on a band, not a narrow circular screen. iOS has always been about swiping gestures and there’s a lot more room for non-visible content on a rectangular screen than an circular one.

2. Apple won’t compete with Swatch and Rolex.

No matter where I’m going I can take my iPhone. I can’t say the same about a watch. If this product will go mainstream, it will need to fit a variety of lifestyles. From meetings to workouts to dinners and drinks, a band can be worn with nearly anything—a single watch can’t. And to get meaningful data, you’ll need to wear the iWatch nearly 24/7. I can’t see Apple trying to compete with Rolex. Do you really think J Cole would write a song like Mr. Nice Watch about a smart watch? No.

3. No watch band can have all that power.

A band has more space for power than a watch. Battery life will be essential in the success of the iWatch. For the screen, sensors, and chips (like the M7, which can do everything and more than any wearable today) power will be vital to making this product a success. With rumors of 4-5 days of battery life, it will be awfully difficult to pack that much battery capacity into a wristwatch you’re constantly reading tweets on.

4. Nike had some insider info.

I think Tim Cook did Nike a huge favor here. Given that Nike was losing in the band market against Fitbit and Jawbone, could you imagine how challening it would be against Apple? Quit while you’re ahead (or behind, in Nike’s case). But I have no doubt that Nike will get back into wearables soon enough with clothing.

5. Samsung showed how ugly a smart watch really is.

In what is probably one of the most aesthetically appalling products I’ve ever seen in person, the Samsung Galaxy Gear is what happens when Samsung tries to build something first. This is far too nerdy to ever by widely adopted. Though, I would love to see someone taking a picture from their watch, just so I could laugh at them.

6. Angela Ahrendts is kind of a big deal.

If anyone understands fashion, retail, and humanity equally, it’s Angela Ahrendts. After killling it at Burberry for nearly 8 years, Apple persuaded her to assume a role as SVP of Retail and Online Stores. Spending $68M over 4 years makes me believe they have some ambitious plans for her. And her energy talk at TED will be used in an Apple ad within the next year. Guranteed.

7. Beats is about marketing, wearables, or something.

Since Dre is now worth hundreds of millions, he’s not going to wear a watch less than $25K. Ever. Beats gives Apple access to a team that knows how to market an entirely new product within an extremely antiquated market. Kind of sounds like Apple with the iPod and iPhone. Could Jimmy and Dre make watches cool? Probably, but why make watches cool when you could make wearables cool. We have watches already, give us something we’ve never had before. This is where Jimmy and Dre come in.

Bonus: 8. Apple executives really like long sleeves and these would get stuck on a watch.

For more on this super cool concept, peep this vid:

Fin