Lately, I’ve been seeing things in a very strange way. Literally. The colors are not as bright as they used to be, it’s like a filter or something that makes me see everything opaque, kind of dim. I felt the same way twice before in my life.
The first time that happened, I was 7. At the second time, I was 16. Now, I’m 26 and old enough to know it’s gonna be fine. I’ve learned, maybe in the hardest way, that we sometimes don’t get to be with the ones we love, even if we love them too much, like I love you.
But the point is that you’ve earned the right to be my person. You’ve earned the right to call me whenever, regardless of time or situation, to ask me for help, to cry on my shoulders, to complain about life or to just chit-chat when you feel lonely. You’ve earned the right to have all my attention and to have all my respect, even though you sometimes seem not to respect me. You’ve earned the right to have my profound love and caring and nobody, not even you, will take this away. You can go missing for ages, I’ll still be here if you ever want to come back.
Things are sad now, as I told you they would be if you decided to leave, but they’ll get better eventually. They always do. I’ll see the colors as they are, bright and warm, and, hopefully, I won’t feel the world is different now that you’re not here. It will take time, perhaps, but it will happen.
I know, though, I will always miss you. You’ve marked me forever, like a permanent tattoo that can’t be removed, not even with laser. I hope you find what makes you happy, because the world deserves your smile and your weird laugh. And you deserve to be completely in love with life.