You turn your throat into a closet for all the things that don’t quite fit yet.

Let me tell you the story of how I died.

In a bad round of a bad game one of my teammates asks, “Are you a girl?” My friend Natalie does her best to play it off and the dude says some creep shit. I hope it’ll be fine but I know Valorant better than that. Its a product of the League of Legends and Counter-Strike communities, which is to say that its a living nightmare. More than its heritage though, there’s something mechanical to the way Valorant makes monsters. Like League of Legends, dying actively harms your team. Without mid-round respawns losing a pair of eyes and guns is…

Video games are the perfect medium for themes of resistance, and they need to be better

Courtesy of Heather Flowers

I am a terrible smear of red on the desert. I am a screaming, clawing, kicking thing. I am a body abstracted. I am a machine made of blood and bones and I am throwing a fascist off the edge of a cliff. I am a meatpunk.

When I saw the brilliant team that’s been assembled for season two of Extreme Meatpunks Forever, which just reached its funding goal on Kickstarter, I realized the first season had to be something special. I expected to play a very cool and very punk game about mechs. What I didn’t expect was for…

A post-mission report detailing the damages to pilots and ‘Mechs both.

Echo once bore the name of a minor noble house until the day her mother spit in her open mouth and demanded she never come back. All of this over a kiss. She climbed into the family’s ENF-4F Battlemech, ran ignition sequences, and left with the heirloom slated for her eldest brother’s 18th birthday. This was the first time she touched it, this body, the machine. It was intoxicating.

She would go on to enter the gladiatorial pits of Solaris where she showed incredible talent her rookie year, she always was a quick study. She left the pits with a…

How video game character creators helped me explore my own queerness

The man with the gun who I failed to make pretty. His job is to pretend to not want violence, and then to do it.

“Are you a boy? Or a girl?” Pokemon Diamond asked me as I sat on the floor of my grandmother’s living room, the light from my brand new Nintendo DS and those from the Christmas tree fighting for space on my face.

I sat there for a very long time.

This decision, as small as it may seem, required me to question, fundamentally, what I wanted from this character and from this game. On one hand, boys were cool, and on the other, girls were pretty. And never the twain should meet because, as we all know, these are entirely…

Renata Price

I’m a nonbinary video games writer and poet. I’m interested in questions about bodies, performance, and how we tell stories

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