23 feels like 22 but with the exhaustion of 34…

It smells like the stale laundry you left in the washer over night and tastes bitter like dark chocolate or the realization you cant make other people care about the same shit you do. Nights grow shorter because you go home earlier because theres nothing out there that’s not at home, that’s not on television, thats not lost in the dark jungle of your inbox.

Somehow i am older and it feels like im better and worse at taking care of myself simultaneously. Example: These pants are dirty, im not wearing underwear, i did brush my teeth. I raised over $300 for charity, i have less than $3 in my bank account.

I missed my dads birthday, my brothers first kiss and my mothers goodbye. Im very tired but it smells like rain and my friends tell jokes that make my face hurt from smiling. Its easier to laugh than it is to breathe most days. Fuck bath bombs.