If you’ve been doing it for a while, you probably have a catalog full of funny parenting stories to tell. Maybe you even have times where the whole day goes into the history books as fantastically disastrous. But what’s even better is when you can share an epic, funny parenting story… about your spouse.

Strap in folks. Kristi’s jeans are about to rip.

An Adventure Unlike Any Other

Let me start by saying that I have complete permission from my wife to share this story. What’s the point of having a (hopefully) funny parenting blog if we can’t be open and honest about our own parenting disasters, right? And if you’ve been following me for long, you know my family has a history of adventures that seem to go incredibly wrong. So maybe we should have expected it when I announced to Kristi, “I think we should head south of Seattle to run our errands today instead of up by our house. …

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It was a day that started out like any other. We had nothing planned, so we decided to head into downtown Seattle for a little sightseeing, shopping at the book store, and family fun. Parenting reality at its best! Little did I know, none of those things were going to be accomplished.

Ok, so we ended up having fun, just not at all in the way we expected. I don’t know if you’re like me on this, but as a parent, I get super excited when I think I’ve planned the perfect family day. I get giddy inside, and though I try not to show it, I’m bursting with excitement for the awesome day I’m about to give my wife and kids. Almost 100% of the time, the day goes nothing like I had planned, and either one or both of the kids melts down — or I do. …

Reflections from a flawed father.

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It would be easy for people to look at me and think, “Well there’s a guy who is going nowhere.” I moved our family across the country twice within 11 months — the first time because I landed my “dream job”, and the second time because that “dream job” didn’t end up being all that dreamy. I’m certainly not perfect, and there’s a lot I don’t have figured out yet. But there’s one thing I DO know.

I’m incredibly flawed.

Knowing this helps keep me grounded. It reminds me that life isn’t about what you know, it’s about what you’re willing to learn. It helps me realize that in order to be a good dad, I can’t just wing it. I have to read, explore, and talk with other parents. I have to acknowledge when I could have handled situations better, learn from my mistakes, and celebrate the fun times and victories, no matter how small they may be. And having two daughters has helped me find wisdom in some of the most unexpected places. In fact, some of the most poignant and sage advice I’ve ever received is from Queen Elsa in Disney’s “Frozen.” …


Brian Armstrong

Writer | Fundraiser | Dad | I’m an enigma wrapped in a riddle wrapped in awesomeness.

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