I’m certainly not going to argue against your post — I agree with it. I would additionally like to point out that if 80% of women are faking it 50% of the time, even non-porn-watching men will have a hell of a time figuring out what’s really happening. :-( I believe that if you want to know if you’re actually pleasing someone in bed, ask them what they want, do that, and get more feedback. Don’t just ask if they liked something that you did. If they can’t tell you what they want, your chances of pleasing your partner are pretty miserable, because there’s a very wide range of behaviors and nuances out there, and while playing “getting warmer” can be fun, it isn’t as spot on as “do this”.
Even worse is when the formula is achieved, and then there’s no veering from that formula — perhaps the fastest way to turn sex into a chore, instead of the absolutely best way to share time with someone you love.