Conquer anxiety in 17 steps

It was a little over 20 years ago that I discovered the power of mindfulness in my own life. I have been practicing it ever since, and teaching my clients to do the same.

Of course, learning to live in the moment can be accomplished without the benefit of formal meditation. However, meditation can make it stronger. It can also increase your understanding of just how calm and focused you can become. I began practicing meditation in the early 1990’s, when I had the privilege of studying from the late Richard Langlois, Roshi. An American Zen Master who lived a two hour drive from my home.

Through the meditation exercise I learned from Roshi, I began to embrace change more easily. With a sense of curiosity instead of anxiety. An essential skill for being more resilient in virtually any circumstance.

Those who know me often say, “You have a certain peace about you.”

Kind words which refer to the power of this practice. Are you ready to learn this meditation practice? Wonderful, let’s begin.

Begin by finding a place to sit down. A comfortable chair will do, one where your feet lie flat on the ground and the back of your thighs rest flat on the chair.
You’re looking for a spot where you can sit comfortably and sit straight up without the need to constantly readjust yourself.
Your hands should be resting comfortably on your lap, but close to your abdomen. If they are too far out your shoulders will round forward and you will no longer be sitting up straight.
Now, point your face straight ahead, but cast your eyes gently down about two-thirds of the way.
Your eyes should be open, but they shouldn’t be focusing on anything. You should be concerned only with feeling your breath, not looking at anything.
You may want to face a blank wall so your eyes won’t be inclined to wander around.
Next, relax your shoulders and then the rest of your body. You only want enough tension to maintain your posture.
You must be relaxed to practice calmness, but not so relaxed that you feel drowsy. You’re training your mind for alertness and focus, not relaxation.
Once your posture is stable, just begin to feel your breathing. Breathe in and out through your nose, and allow your breaths to naturally become deeper. This is not lung breathing, we’re talking about; you should be feeling your abdomen rise and fall. You are breathing from your center.
You may be tempted to force yourself to breathe deeper but don’t. Your body naturally breathes more deeply when it is calm. So just allow the breathing to happen on its own, and you will gradually feel it deepen.
Relax your abdomen as you breathe so that your diaphragm can easily expand and your lungs can fill completely. The more relaxed the abdomen, the deeper the breath.
Lastly, the manner in which you mind or mentally watch your breath is essential. As I said before, your breathing is happening spontaneously, and you are not manipulating it in any way. The abdomen rises, and the abdomen falls. The breath moves in, the breath moves out. Watch each inhalation, and each exhalation. Observe moment to moment.
As you practice minding the breath, you may begin to experience thoughts running through your mind, such as everything you have to do today. This is common because when your mind is clear, anything can fly in to try and take your attention for itself. So you need to practice gently taking your mind back.
When you notice that you’ve become distracted, all you need to do is acknowledge that fact and return to minding your breath. Eventually, with much practice, the thoughts that enter won’t even catch your attention; they will just enter and leave.
In doing this you are practicing keeping your mind focused on exactly what you’re doing at this moment, which is watching your breath. When a thought of something else rushes in, you’re simply putting it aside and getting back to what you’re doing. Eventually, this ability will work its way into every activity in your life so that you’ll be able to focus intensely with little or no distraction.
You should practice this exercise for no less than five minutes at a time, as it may take a bit for your mind and breath to become calm.Half an hour or more at a time is ideal. Don’t be upset with yourself if you aren’t able to perfect this technique right away. Initially, your mind can be like a racehorse that was just let out of the gate. It may take time for it to slow down. Be diligent and patient. Your mind will become more and more trainable, but you must practice and practice often.Through this practice you learn not to become distracted by things that are not related to what you’re doing. You learn to stay on task by concentrating precisely on what’s happening in this moment. No matter how busy the environment is around you, you are concerned with where you’re at in that situation and tending to it. This is a powerful tool. Once your mind is trained for this, you can walk into chaos and remain calm. After all, this practice teaches you not to seek control in the moment or manipulate your breath or the thoughts racing through your mind but just watch them and let them be.
Now practice, practice, practice and let me know if you have any questions.