Poem: Finding the God of My Understanding
First introduced in the Catholic Church.
This was “God’s house on earth.”
The rituals were the path
To avoid God’s wrath.
But this is where I became aware
That Divine Love was there.
I was 11 when I became “saved,”
But I was still told how to behave.
They tried to tell me how to vote
And shoved “purity” down my throat.
Women did not have the right to choose,
And heaven was something the gays would lose.
The leaders were still all men,
Which made no sense.
I did not believe in this,
So, this was not the right fit.
But this taught me a deeper spiritual experience
And provided a greater sense of reverence.
Tired of the guilt trip,
I became an agnostic atheist.
Free of the ecclesiastical garb,
But wanted to believe only Love was in charge.
Recovery taught me to ask for help
From a Power Greater than Myself.
Learned that spirituality began on the inside,
where the God of My Understanding would reside.
Engulfed in a peaceful energy,
This was the God that resonated with me.
Not an old man condemning and judging,
But a Spirit that is always guiding and loving.
First things first,
So, I started by calling It “The Universe.”
Now, I also call It Spirit
Because I can always feel It.
I also call It Source
And also the Life Force.
I often call It The Divine
Because It is too vast to really define.
I sometimes call It Heavenly Parent
Because Its love is unconditional and inherent.
Many names, but It is simply Love
That does not just exist above,
But It can also be found
Above, below, and all around.
It is the very essence of life,
The energy that brings delight.
It is the force field in which we live, move, and have our being,
So, any idea of separation is deceiving.
In Its spirit I am free
Because It lives in me, through me, and as me.
The God that is the fire of my heart appeared
When theology and rhetoric no longer interfered.
I commune with It in an inclusive church,
But also in my room, at the beach, and even at work.
Now whenever I write,
It is a testimony of how Its might
Transformed my soul
When I let go of control.
I found the God of My Understanding,
And my spiritual journey is ever-expanding.
