My mom, Toni The Talker, is leading a class at the University of St. Francis and one of the lessons was to answer my “Who, What, Where, How” and then connect the dots with all of those and write my prologue with the “Why.” I’m sparing details as I do not like to be wordy but providing some background on what is below. I have to admit, I can be last minute sometimes and this took me about 40 or so minutes to write but it was challenging thinking about how I can tie my story together and how one era connects to the next.
I read my prologue to my mom and she encouraged me to post it on Medium so here it is below :) Hope you enjoy!
From the tender age of 11, I was the kid who could sell gum and jewelry with the same ease as I rode bikes or played basketball. My fascination with the inner workings of electronics, from burning CDs to dissecting video games, was just as much a part of me as the freedom I felt roller skating through my neighborhood. Haywood (my minority affairs advisor at SIUC) saw potential in a bright-eyed kid, not much different from a sports scout, and instilled in me the belief that I could lead as a student body president — a vision I turned into reality by my junior year at SIUC.
My twenties were a intense mix of ambition and the pursuit of achievement. I wore entrepreneurship like a badge of honor, and my career in strategy consulting at Accenture became a significant part of my identity. However, this path often led me down the road of people-pleasing and an unwavering commitment to the capitalist grind. It took five years of therapy and a nine-month sabbatical from my career to peel back the layers of who I had become, to reconnect with who I truly am, and to redefine what success meant to me.
Relationships during this time were tumultuous, each one teaching me that love isn’t about finding the right person, but about becoming the right person for yourself. My move to London was steeped in the illusion that a change of scenery could offer a change of mind, but the city’s vibrant pulse couldn’t quiet the introspective journey I needed to embark on. It was only when I paused my relentless pursuit of external achievements that I could sit with the parts of myself I struggled with, learn to empathize with them, and begin to heal.
Bali offered me a sanctuary of peace, a place where my dream of building a dog sanctuary could one day become reality, and where I could carve out a space for myself amidst the serenity. Chicago represented the height of my youthful dreams — living in a high-rise, walking into a high-profile job in a suit, owning a condo in South Loop, driving a Mercedes AMG. But none of these symbols of success could bring the happiness I sought.
In this period of renaissance, I’ve learned to detach from the accolades and possessions that once defined me. My focus has shifted to creating a life that pleases me, one that embraces change and the joy of the journey. I’ve rekindled the pure joy I found in simple pleasures as a child, now with the wisdom of my experiences. My path forward isn’t about having all the answers or creating a life that sounds impressive to others; it’s about authenticity, personal fulfillment, and cherishing each step of the ever-evolving path I tread.
This narrative is a snapshot of my life, a testament to the growth and self-discovery that continue to shape me. It’s about reclaiming the essence of my younger self, unburdened by the world’s expectations, and moving forward with the understanding that happiness is an internal quest, not an external conquest.
-BGREAT
